GA Hauser's Blog-THIS BLOG CONTAINS MEN WITH MEN-GET OVER IT

The Sequel to The Sequel- Stay tuned.

2012-01-16T11:59:00.000-08:00

Eighty books.
I have passed the eighty book count and with the idea of writing a dozen novels per year in mind, I will close in on one hundred by December 2012. My oh my.
I know a few fellow authors who are churning out the novels like I am, keeping quality high, Stormy Glenn, Lynn Hagen, to name two. And I'm sure other authors are now aspiring to do the same, realizing their fan base is growing and they are flowing with creative juices. Patricia Logan now has that goal in mind. One a month. It's lofty, but worth the effort.
Of course with the large production of novels comes choices. Single titles or series? Trilogy or two book sequels?
Luckily my style of writing has created a universe of men who come and go with ease in and out of each of my novels. Anyone who is a fan and has read a handful of my work can recognize that- well, if you need a lawyer in LA, you call Jack Larsen or Colt St John. Need a tattoo? No need to look further than Dirty Harry's tattoo shop.
As I create a world where my characters thrive and become community members, sequels bring to life characters from books you may have read a while back.
Suddenly you see a familiar name or description and think, where do I know this guy from?
It's the fun of discovering that individual and where you first found them. Kind of like a memory test or puzzle.
The Last Hard Man- which I am now in the process of writing, has Sam Lockwood. Sam has been in Down and Dirty, as well as Going Wild. He was Alexander Richfield's wild biker fuck, and of course the extra man who played the fourth when the Callahan brothers got down and dirty with Jean DuLac.
Who else will you recognized in The Last Hard Man? Remember Lion? Our Dom from Born to Please? Yes, he makes a guest appearance, as does the ever uptight Tony Spagna from Leather Boys and Got Men?
Can I just say writing like this, making the novels an alternate reality, is fun. Damn good fun.
When people wonder how I can write so much, I think, easy. Look at all the men there are in my world. Never ending. And to top that off, my fans ask for characters to be featured in their own books.
Midnight in London has the brilliant Ted Mack who we know from Lancelot in Love. Don't forget Brandon Kennedy, from Happy Endings. So many fans knew something felt mysterious about Brandon in that book, they asked me what the deal was with him. Of course Living Dangerously is Brandon's story.
Sequel, Spin-off, Series?
I have no idea what to call it.
But this year, as I close in on ninety novels in my collection, expect to see my Vampire Daniel Wolf and his hot Man-eater, Brock Hart, reappear...as vamps this time. And who knows who's next? Perhaps Andy Gore, the savvy hot shot lawyer from The Crush will be the next star.
If you want stories about men you know and grow fond of, look no further. This year will be very exciting for my fans.
And of course, expect book 11 from the Action Boys- coming by summer time.

Be safe out there.

End of the year musing from Mark Antonious

2011-12-24T12:24:00.000-08:00

Whilst, Ms Hauser cooks up a storm for her various family and friend gatherings this weekend, she has again requested I fill in. Never one to complain...well, rarely, I accepted. I am terrible in the kitchen, and Steven, Adam, and Jackie-blue, usually boot me out and say I am in their way. So...since I am not wanted in the kitchen, I am at the computer.
What is there to say that has not been said, you may ask? I asked myself this as well.
I want you to know as I passed my...-unlisted number- birthday...I attempt to live and learn. Most don't, most can't, I try.
Guess what? Humans are quite fragile.
Oh, yes, love, we bloody are.
I have seen the toughest blokes weep, the strongest women collapse under the intense pressures of life, and pompous young studs, back away when they feel too threatened.
We are all just a bag of blood and bones in reality. Oh, we dream of being immortal vampires, (don't get me started about 'that' incident...Steve flirted with a vampire, and as you can guess, trouble followed, but that is a tale for another day.)

Fragile.
Yes, indeed. We are suffering little buggers whose bodies give out, create pain censors that rival any pleasure we endure, and don't even get me started on our emotional fragility.
Anyone who knows me, realizes, yes, I am a man, quite tall, not too muscular, and simply put, not the strongest mentally. I go to a shrink, take Valium, and lean on three men for support.
As I read posts and listen to dear friends, I know I am not alone in being, well, 'fragile'. Many of us are thrown blows to overcome, one after the other. I admire the devil out of the ones who do not complain, and just give us the stiff upper lip and move on. If it were only that simple.
In my past I have teetered on suicidal thoughts, of course nearly committing it once in college and once recently when I thought Alexander, my son, and Steven were going to run off and leave me...but again, for those of you who know me well, that is old news. Yet every day for most of us, is a steady stream of trials and tribulations. On their own, the small problems are quiet simple to leap over, but placed on top of one another, they seem as impossible to navigate as a flight to the stars.
What can I say, but we must keep moving forward. And this too shall pass, Ms Hauser continues to remind me. (I think her mother used to say it) But we do get overwrought at times.
And this time of year, more stress than at others.
So, to end this endless stream of nonsense...
Hang in there. Indeed we do sometimes meet up with dilemmas and painful ordeals to bear. We are so bloody fragile, at times I do worry for the ones I hold dear. Our lifespan on this earth is ever so fleeting.
Do take care to remember to be kind. Love, do not hate. Say a sweet word, not a petty one. We are only human...none perfect.
Happy Holidays to all my fans and friends. And remember to share a smile instead of a sneer of jealousy or contempt. Not only are you fragile, but others are as well.
Love to all of you.
Mark

(All right, Ms Hauser?)
(Perfect, Mark. Come have a cookie.)
(Just one.)
(Just one.)

Shall We Begin With The End?

2011-12-19T19:17:00.003-08:00

By now you are either ready for the holiday chaos or going nuts trying to be.
Traffic becomes impossible to navigate, you couldn't pay me to head to a mall and well, life as we know it becomes manic- I mean MANIC- high up, low down, high up, low down, and that's before dipping into the eggnog.

As an author and of course not immune to the sting of critics and frenemies...I too have to vent on occasion though I find myself playing shrink for so many others I sometime wonder if I should get paid by the hour. I think it's nice that so many people are comfortable telling me their problems, deepest secrets and uh hum, personal business. Yes, well, perhaps a scene or two may show up in my novels, but I am a vault as far as other's secrets are concerned. You tell me, it goes nowhere.

I have too many times been the recipient of evil tongues, and I'm not talking about the ones you want in your mouth. I would never complain about those.

Okay, what I came here for is to tell you about The End.
My novels all but one, have happy endings. We crave that. I do. When I watch a movie I want it to make me feel good. Books are no different. For the most part, we want to feel content. 'Aww, that is so cute,' kind of moment.

One particular comment in a review has got me slightly perturbed. Not angry, lord knows I've been chewed up and spit out, mostly by other authors, for my work. After reading most if not all of them I shrug and say, oh, well, can't please everyone. But this one issue does bug me. The End.
When I watch a movie with a love premise, the movie usually ends when the couple manage to make it as a pair. Then the credits roll up. We don't see, after the Happy Ending and the couple eating breakfast, or going to work, or maybe sitting on a sofa and watching TV. Day after day. No. The movie ends, literally, at the beginning of the successful union. You see, my dears, the drama is how they get there from here. Not what happens once they are together. Yes, there are exceptions. Your craving for Mark and the boys makes the drama continue like a soap opera, or in this case, a lubrication opera.
But I do get why some people don't want those two words, The End, to show up. They like the characters, they like the story, and they want to spend more time with them. That, is very flattering to an author. Hearing, 'Write a sequel, please, what happens next?' That means you delivered.
Let me assure anyone who bothers to read my rantings on this blog or elsewhere, GA does not do 'rush jobs'. I think because of my one book a month goal, I may give the impression that I snap my fingers and without any thought a book comes out of my files. First of all, I am months ahead. No rush, no deadlines. And I work for me. If a book is released the first, mid or last of the month, that's entirely my call.
I assure you that each novel gets the same attention to detail, hard work, and thought, as every other. But! When the end comes too quickly, I get accused of 'a rush job'. No, my dears, see it as what it is. You don't want it to end! I get that, I do. I love my men too and sometimes writing those two words is hard. But I know me. They will come back, either on their own in a sequel or as a guest. So believe me when I say, I do not rush. On the contrary. I spend the exact same time for each book. I never change my production methods. They are done with care, consideration, and of course, common sense.
Inevitably the book's goal is to get the lovers together. Any reasonably intelligent person can guess once they have succeeded, they live, 'Happily Ever After' The End.
Do you love my men so much you want another fifty to a hundred pages of what comes next? Yes, if something were to occur, but...the goal was met.
All Prince Charming has to do is propose, then the credits roll.

I think what annoyed me the most, was the fact that I may not care deeply about each novel I write. The opposite couldn't be more true. I strive to make each book, top the previous. And so many kind, thoughtful authors know that a careless review from someone who has no clue how to write, can really make ya feel, well, pissed off, or questioning where you placed, The End. Even though the writer of the review meant it in the nastiest way possible, I still look at it as a plus. They didn't want the book to end. That's a good thing. And if my readers crave to know about the morning after the night before, then I will certainly strive for a more complete novel. Just don't tell me I was too long winded, and a bore if I go on and on about the happy couple's normal life.

Heck, life is manic this time of year, and life in general tugs us up and down by its very nature. I guess if the worst thing have to blog about is someone wishing my story was longer, then I could have a worse life.

Be safe, especially this time of year when every one's head is up their butt.

Another Year Goes Away

2011-12-13T20:56:00.000-08:00

During the last few weeks of the year many of us become reflective of the last twelve months.
What have we done? Have we achieved our goals? Made new friends? Lost loved ones? Fought battles and won or lost?
The media recalls names of celebrities who passed away, shows the year in photos to see our world's greatest and worst moments.

It's only natural as the 'New Year' of our lives comes close enough to touch we think about what lies ahead or what we have done with the 365 days we just had. Could we have improved on any of our decisions? Tried any harder?

Perhaps writers, poets, and artists are more susceptible to nostalgia. Maybe we are true romantics at heart who strive for the ideal, the true love, the perfect home, the dream job. I know I am very ambitious and have goals firmly in place in my mind. A book a month. Can I continue this into the next year? It won't be for lack of trying.

But more than an individual goal, should we think on a larger level? What can we do to give back to our community, our vote in the 2012 election will count, our lifestyle will forever not only impact us but generations to come.

Will we appreciated our loved ones more because of those we lost that were dear to us? Or will we live the same year over and over again?

As you pass through the last few weeks of December, think about who you are and what you want to do with your life for the next year. Because inevitably you will once again be looking another year in the face.
Will you be kind and give to the people in your life, treat associates and strangers with humanity? Or will you take out all of your anger and frustration on others, simply because you can't succeed in your rage and hate?

Life is about choices, luck, fate, and maybe just an ounce of wisdom tossed in for good measure.
Personally, I'll be happy if I keep moving down the path I have chosen. I have no past regrets and a future filled with new fantasies to write, new fans to meet, and adventures ahead that are unimaginable.
Like Jim Morrison said, "Did you have a good world when you died? -enough to base a movie on?”

If not, time to let go of the past, the anger, the jealousy, and start living again.
January 1st 2012...a new beginning, or a life poorly lived. You decide.

Be careful out there-

I Have News For You- Men Are Hotter Than Women

2011-12-05T19:13:00.000-08:00

Ya know...I've been around the block a few times and most of my life- if not all- I have been inundated with glamor models- women- with flat painted faces- who all look like mannikins- on every magazine, in the movies, overloading the television shows...to me- plastic molded flat faces that do nothing for me. Nadda.
Is it news to my fans that the inequity of the male/female ratio of prettiness is uneven? Like lopsided to death? No. I've said it again and again. Guess what? MEN ARE GORGEOUS.
Yeah, that's right. Wanna challenge me? Disagree? Wanna punch in the noggin?

I would disagree too if all I had to look at were the freaks the media tosses at us. Take a pad, find a pen. Sit in front of the idiot box for an hour. Make two columns on your pad. Pretty women. Ugly men. Now, each time an ad or television show airs, mark a tick on the pad under the correct column. By the end of the night, I have calculated 30 plus decent looking women, and dozens of gross beasts they call men. If I'm lucky, I see 1 handsome man. Why? WHY????
Are the powers that be in media sooooo terrified of MEN? Pretty- muscular-masculine-gorgeous men? Yes indeed!!! But guess what? I found them. The internet is alive with MALE beauty. Look below, tell me these pictures don't show how Men not women, are the peacocks, the fabulous sex of our species. My oh my, they are. And the more men I see on the net the more convinced I am, that men are GORGEOUS. Got news for all of you- Women love men who look like this. Wanna sell products? Get women to theaters? Take a peek below. Stop hiding these hunks on internet sites. Get a clue.
Oh, never mind. There are men who are terrified they may be excited to look at these pictures...men who are hiding how they feel. So they don't allow beautiful men like these to be shown. I call them paranoid. Homophobic? I don't care if you're male or female, the photos below are hot!
Hey, psst. Come 'ere. I have news for you. Men are hotter than women-
Ha. Why do I write gay male porn?? Really? Do you really need to ask? Well, now you can stop asking. I just told you.

Be safe out there.

Up and Coming- Book 10 of the Action! Series

2011-12-01T20:15:00.000-08:00

Mark Antonious Richfield, Steven Jay Miller, Jack Charles Larsen, Adam Lewis...Alexander Mark Lehman-Richfield, Lt Billy Sharpe...
Names that to me are like a roll call of my friends.
Writers are insane. In case you didn't know. They spend 90% of their day in their heads, weaving tales. They may be working other jobs, going to school, exercising, cooking, whatever, but they are weaving stories in their heads constantly.

Back in 1990 I began writing full length fiction books. And the first character I invented was Mark. Mark Antonious. Where did he come from? I wanted him to be more beautiful than any woman, with a body that was perfection, yet with so many flaws you could bear him.
I remember reading a quote and I don't know who said it but it struck me. Beauty to be acceptable must somehow be punished. Something like that. And well, it made sense in my warped mind. So Mark Antonious became my greatly flawed beauty.
My first books about Mark were of his struggle to choose between his best friend, Jack Larsen, and his woman suitor, Sharon Tice. I wrote four books about those three, beginning to flesh out who Mark and Jack were. In those books Mark and Jack were lovers, and Sharon had to accept defeat. I remember thinking, I wanted the reader to root for Jack to win Mark, because inevitably Jack was better for Mark than Sharon was. It had nothing to do with gay or straight. Just compatibility. Jack was better suited to handle a mess like Mark.

Mark was an architect, with an abusive father, and a cold British mother, rich, yet, isolated. Why was he all those things? I have no idea. But that's always who he was to me. I have several sketch books of Mark's image. What I think he should look like. Him and Jack together. Back then there wasn't such an incredible selection of photos on the net, I could never find Mark reflected in a real person. I perhaps now have with a super model, which is ironic since that is what Mark is in fiction.
Did I ever think Mark would become a character who was loved by his fans? No.
Actually I have had several hate reviews about him. Someone on All Romance ebooks actually tagged the Action! Series with 'Kill Mark' 'Kill Alex'. Amazing how fictional characters could emote such a strong feeling. But alas, Mark overcame most of his haters and is loved by many. Does my series always get rave reviews? Hardly. There is a strong mixture of love and hate there too- I have to admit, writing a series is a challenge. You tend to write for the people who read them all, and some do not stand alone. Which is something I am aware of, but I'm trying not to be repetitive to the fans who know these men inside and out, quite literally. So some have been slammed while others praised. Normal stuff for a writer. I try to keep their stories rich without the melodrama of soap opera type happenings. After all, how much trouble can 4 gay men, 1 gay son and his lieutenant lover, get into? Well, there always is Alex. I love Alex. He is my comic relief and my trouble causer. What would I do without him?
So onward we go to Book 10- Good God! Ten? And to be honest you have to include, Capital Games where Steve met Mark, and When Adam Met Jack, (self explanatory) not to mention Love You Loveday, or perhaps Mark and Sharon and Miller's Tale. It depends how much you love those guys and who you want to know more about.
But as I draw closer to releasing this next volume in my best selling series, I feel more a part of those men than ever- after all, they are all little bits of me and knowing them for nearly 22 years? That's longer than most marriages last.
I hope as release time draws near, you are happy with the latest installment of Mark and the boys.
Because if you love it, well, then there will be a number 11!

Be safe out there.

Who Gets To Decide?

2011-11-23T20:27:00.000-08:00

On the eve of being thankful, another holiday that has become controversial because of its origin, I begin to wonder who gets to decide.
Who decides what we celebrate and why? Who decides what is right for our nation and why?
Decisions I do not take lightly- Though sometimes I fly by the seat of my pants and go with what I know- inevitably decisions are important and have the ability to effect people.
The bigger the decision maker- the more effect they have-
Some people think we should not celebrate Thanksgiving because of the treatment of our native Americans- so should we decide to erase this holiday from our calendars? Who gets to decide?

I have once again been subject to censorship- but this time it's in a very odd place. A gay magazine. Why would a magazine called The Advocate-defined as 'a person who speaks or writes in support of a cause'- censor an ad for one of my gay romances? Who decided that? There was no exposed cock, ass or even a kiss. But the picture was 'too suggestive' for their other advertising clients. Say what?? The picture of two men together is too suggestive for their ??? advertisers? Not their readers, not their staff, they are pandering to the right wing GOP? who advertise in their magazine? Sorry if I am confused. The cover design was approved by my contact in the ad department, then rejected after it was made into a complete ad and submitted. A book cover, about gay romance, rejected for being too suggestive in a gay magazine.
Who decided that?
And if they had published my book cover- would they sincerely have had a mass exodus of their high paying clients? Advertising clients who pay for ads in a gay magazine- The Advocate- known for being gay for decades- yet...we may offend a conservative advertiser.
Color me confused.
The same ad was welcomed by Attitude Magazine in the UK. They bloody loved it! (to coin a mark-ism) So my cover and ad in the United Kingdom was welcomed and accepted without hesitation.
I am only more and more aware of how the USA is becoming a haven for the conservative right. More and more sickened as the views of one slanted hateful side of our country, gains leverage in something as important to the gay community, as a gay magazine.
Who gets to decide?
One person votes yay or nay? A raise of hands?
Doesn't matter, does it? You may think Thanksgiving celebrates something not too pretty in our nation's history- good luck getting it removed from our calendar- to be honest, I don't know how I'd feel about it either way- most of our traditions are about money- oh, yes, that's right. The Advocate again. Money- not rights- censorship is okay, if it keeps money from walking away from their coffers.
I sigh in defeat. Oh well, I'll always have London...
Be safe
and remember the troops while you pig out at your dinner table.

How to treat your fans- 101

2011-11-14T17:04:00.000-08:00

First I want to thank Mark for his help when I was fuming and struggling with what to write on this blog without making everyone angry or stirring a pot that has already overflowed and burned to the ground.

Right- now for class, students...and believe me, I'm no expert but that has never stopped me from standing in front of a crowd and giving a lecture. (sometimes making myself a fool, but what can ya do?)

Lesson 1- Like your fans-
Sounds like a no brainer. But there are ways to show your fans you like them. For example. Thank them. They are why you are here. Without them, you'd be flipping burgers.

Lesson 2- Answer your emails from you fans-
Don't ignore anyone. Just how busy are you that you can say, thanks for emailing me. I write, publish and promote a book a month yet I can still say, thank you.

Lesson 3- Give your greatest fans free things-
Look, if someone has every book you've written, give them the next one free. Really? Can't manage to send out a book or efile to show your appreciation? Why the hell not?

Lesson 4- Be true to your fans-
Tell them who you are. Don't deceive. Okay, this one Mark warned me about. But I had to say it.

Lesson 5- Your fans are intelligent people! They read for cryin out loud! Don't bore the snot out of them with the same crappy story of man meets man, man parts from man, man finds his way back to man. Come on, people. Think out of the box. Okay, my novels may not be for everyone, and like I said I am no expert, but go where no one has gone. If your novels can be cut and pasted on someone else's with only the character names changed? You write boring romance novels.

Lesson- 6- Have a sense of humor.
Laugh at yourself. So what? You messed up and had a cell phone appear in a victorian bodice ripper, oops. Have a chuckle about it. Don't take yourself too seriously.

Lesson 7-Don't sweat the crappy reviews and critics-
Most are disgruntled authors who haven't even read your book, ignore them. And never get into a pissing match.

I think these lessons above can help any author gain respect from their fans. No one is an island. Our readers need us to make them laugh, cry, or fuck like bunnies, and we need them to earn a living. So treat your fans with respect and you will live long and prosper. (Yeah, so what? Nothing wrong with science fiction.)

Be safe-

(How did I do, Mark?)
(Just fine, Ms Hauser...just fine.)

More musing from Mark Antonious

2011-11-12T11:51:00.000-08:00

Hullo, my lovelies, yes, it's me again. GA has been struggling as of late with what she wants to rant about. She emailed me several rough drafts for this blog and they were so controversial I immediately told her to delete them. Of course you all know what a pest she is, and she does get on her soap box about things. So...
I am here in her stead.
With the winter/Christmas and spring cologne campaigns done and dusted, I have more time for my loves and my life. But too much time to think.
Another year has past, and if you ask me, much too quickly. Are we really planning New Years yet again? 2012? My word where does it go?
Many of you who know me well understand I have a hatred of time...particularly the kind of time that tacks on ten years to you and didn't even tap you on the shoulder to say, sorry, love.
Whatever you do, do not wish me a happy birthday- They are not happy- quite the contrary.
All right, enough rambling, she did say I should have some message, some point.
I do have one.
It's about cheating. No, I haven't cheated on Steven. Calm down! I won't. I think I won't. No. I won't.
Here's my point. Now that Alexander has gotten Steven and I onto a social network, which you all know and I don't have to name here...how much thinner is the line between cheating and not cheating?
If you 'poke' a man...a lot. Is that cheating? What if you share flirtatious comments? Crossing the line then?
Having been a 'pretty boy' most of my life, I have had many suitors, some wanted, some most assuredly unwanted. I've had me bottom pinched, been kissed by strange women whilst standing in a lift, had propositions of the most dirty kind, endured men sending me photos of their penises, women writing me letters begging me to date them...well, the life of a supermodel I suppose I shan't complain too loudly. But, what if someone is intriguing? No, again, calm down, my lovelies, I am not going to cheat on my husbands. Lord knows I get enough cock from them every week. But still...do any of you fantasize? Perhaps find someone intriguing and begin to wonder...
I'm afraid I do. So? Where's the line? One poke? Two? A few flirtatious comments? Sex via IM? I don't rightly know.
But as a person growing older, with a fragile ego, (yes, you all know it's true!) I suppose I crave adoration. What individual moving closer to obscurity doesn't? Don't we all want the validation that we are still desirable? Fuckable? And an individual as insecure as myself? Well, perhaps it means the world. Will I have real intercourse with someone other than my boys? No. Will I want the delicious sexy comments reaffirming I am loved and desired? Bloody yes! Sorry, lovelies, I am human after all.
So forgive me my frailties, and make that love unconditional.
To err human. To forgive? Priceless!
Perhaps next time on this blog GA can leave the ranting about events that had passed recently. She's all a hyped up and stomping her feet whilst she speaks to me on the phone. The woman acts as if the world revolves around her. It bloody well doesn't. But for now, be good boys and girls, keep loving each other, and have wonderful sex...with your darkest fantasy-
xxoo
Mark

Mark Loves Steven!

2011-10-21T20:47:00.000-07:00

Well, I suppose sitting my flamin' arse down here and writing a blog is long overdue.
Yes, hullo, it's me, Mark Antonious Richfield, for those of you who read about me in GA's Action! Series, you already know me well.
About me...what about me? You either love me or hate me. Oh yes, I've seen some very rude comments about me and my son, Alexander. We know we aren't perfect. Both of us have struggled with a terrible upbringing and felt unloved for a very long time. I don't want to write a blog filled with angst, because Alex and I aren't the only gay men to have been abused, beaten by our fathers or teased and bullied because we were...different.
But Alexander, the child whom came to me at eighteen, by storm, mind- changed my life forever. Our relationship was horrendous in the beginning, and what can you expect since he only found out I was his father at eighteen, and I never knew I had fathered such a son. Alas, we have found each other, for better or worse. Life goes on, we have gotten over some hurdles and we manage.
He has found the love of his life, Lt Billy Sharpe, (yes, the man is twenty years Alex's senior, but...) And I have found my man as well. Steven Jay Miller, lover extraordinaire. Steven and I also got off to a rocky beginning. After all, I was the newcomer to Parsons and Company and my pompous swagger nearly set us up for blows. Luckily our sexual attraction made for a different kind of 'blow'. I sucked his beautiful cock on a business retreat in New Mexico. Did our fellow employees know? Not a clue. They only hoped Steven and I didn't kill each other when we got separated from the group and spent the night out in the frigid cold.
Steven and I lit a fire that night. A fire that awakened what I had been hiding for so long. You see, I was engaged to Sharon Tice at the time. Well, to be honest, I was about to walk down the aisle...no, I did walk down the aisle, to marry a woman. My baby, my lover, Steven, interrupted our wedding ceremony, crying my name. Well! What was I do to? I felt like I was remaking The Graduate and Ben was screaming for Elaine.
My Steven.
The man who has stolen my heart for eternity. We raced off that day, me in my tuxedo, Steven in his sweats and t-shirt. Raced off, driving away from an angry mob of family and friends. To?
To living together in Bel Air, CA. To raising together a wonderful young man, my Alex, to having an incredible relationship with Jack Larsen and Adam Lewis, our closest companions and lovers...
For all of you who believe love in books is not possible, just a fantasy, let me tell you, I am proof that no matter your faults, and yes, lovelies, I have too many to count, there will be that one man who loves you. Loves you even when you fall to pieces, loves you even when you make terrible decisions, and loves you because you have become one.
I love Steven Jay Miller, so deeply, I cry, I hurt, and I will never love another the way I love him.
For all of you who cherish our love, who root for us to continue to succeed and rejoice at the fact that two men, yes, two men, can love and be joined by that love, eternally.
To all of you out there who think there isn't one person out there for them, take heart. Though my Steven is one of a kind, there are men out there who are as incredible as he is. And whether you are a straight couple or a gay couple, you are entitled to that love.

Cheers to my wonderful fans out there. And always remember, it is you who make me who I am.

Treat me or Trick me. Or both-

2011-10-14T15:01:00.000-07:00

I may be a kid at heart, but Halloween is my ultimate favorite holiday and fall is the most wonderful season out of the four. Leaves turn colors, (yes even here in Nor-Cal) and the cool autumn air makes running so much fun! I love the windy dark nights, the spooky decorations that begin to appear; pumpkins, haunted houses, witches, black cats...and that's just at the local brewery! The neighborhood gets decked out as well!
As a kid I wouldn't miss trick or treating for the world. My favorite costumes? Mostly sexy vamps, wild cats, you know, typical mischievous fun for a wild feline woman like me.
Dressing in drag is also great fun- several times I have tried to hide my feminine curves and sported male clothing. To my dismay I didn't succeed in fooling anyone. So I have to be satisfied in being a female...whatever it is I am that year as my disguise.
GLAAD is having a charity event this year which I am delighted to be invited to. Dress as your hero or villian, the invite said, "GLAAD's 25th Anniversary "Hollywood Heroes & Villains"
Hmm, I pondered the options. Well, the variety is endless. Not a big Hollywood fan, yes, I know, so sue me, I decided to once again go my own way. I would tell you all, but then the secret of my disguise would be out. Must not. Though pics of the party will end up on FB- you know me.
But it got me thinking.
Halloween is a time of year we can just be our fantasy person. Isn't it cool to see kids in superhero costumes? Dressed as firemen? Cops? All the wonderful men and women who we aspire to be? Or maybe monsters, scary things, since after all Halloween is for creepiness and ghouls.
Whatever you fancy, this is the time of year to get out the carving knife and murder a pumpkin, spill its seedy guts onto a newspaper and light it on fire with a candle.
I am not a fan of horror movies, unless I get to see Frank Langella as Dracula. Sorry, he was hot. (As most vamps are now.)
Think about it. Who we are, in disguise, on a day that allows us to be our naughty fantasy.
Who will you be? Will you scare others? Be a sexy lover or an over-sized condom?
I think the 'trick' is, to be that one fantasy you crave, and act how you would love to act that one day, one night, one party. You can deal with the hangover the next day.
As I look forward to a gala night with a great charity function, including so many people I can't wait to see...I think about who we are in life.

I will always envision myself a hero. I have fought on that thin blue line that separates the citizens from the suspects. I have loved so deeply I can cry thinking about it. I care, I fight injustice, I give what I can both in donations and in helping others...We don't need one night of fun to be heroes. Every day we can choose to fight hate. Fight intolerance. Battle ignorance.
I am dressed as a warrior forever. You only need to know me to see my disguise is not something I take off after Halloween.
You are the hero. Every time you feel pain in your heart and vote for civil rights and justice, you are who you need to be, every day of the year.

Be safe, and get treats this year. You all know you want it. ;)

LaLalalalala Land- A weekend in West Hollywood

2011-10-03T17:41:00.001-07:00

Trips are like psychic readings...you hope for the best and usually get a mixture of answers and questions.
On the heels of another jaunt south through a whole lot of nothing on I5 and the Grapevine, which believe me is more than just a song to hum while doing laundry, I have mixed feelings about the effort.
The highlight was, as always, bunking with Kage Alan. (No not in the same bed, get your mind out of the gutter). The man is kind, thoughtful, and always a gentleman, even when it comes to who showers first. Needless to say, he's selfless. Pookie better appreciate what an amazing man he's going to marry in the Big Apple!!
So to be honest, just heading down to LaLa land to hang with Kage Alan, and nothing else, would be enough of an excuse to haul ass southbound.
But, as luck and fate would have it, we actually had a book fair to go to Sunday October 2nd.
And ohhhhh that's when the fun began.
Since we are both anal, and please no puns...we scoped out the fair venue before hand. And like good fair participants we obeyed all the rules. Stupid us!! We arrived while it was still dark out because according to the 'rules' you wouldn't be allowed to set up if you arrived after 7am. Well, while Kage and I sat in the dark with our stomachs growling, no one else seemed to think showing up on time was a big deal. Some moseyed in as late as 930. No one seemed to be 'enforcing' rules. We know better now.
Next- where the booth was located which we were assigned. Well! It looked good on paper but it was behind the main traffic area, where all the old gals of television; IE, Florence Henderson, Dyan Cannon, Meredith Baxter...were signing their pricey hard-bounds.
Us? Near a 'story telling stage' with amplified noise. All flicking day!!! Luckily we had a nice man 'Ryan' on sound who kept it to the minimum, which still meant screaming at the top of our lungs to speak to prospective buyers of our books. To say 9 hrs of yammering nonsense wasn't awful would be a lie. No one could tolerate it. Bad spot at the fair, point for the bad luck fairies.
However, Kage and I persevered. Not only did we rebound customers off each other, saying, "Like erotica? See GA. Like Comedy? Kage is your man." Worked like a charm.
Also it was a pleasure to spend the day with Micheal Perronne and Madison Martin. The two of them complimented Kage and my genres. Madison writes straight romance, and Micheal had some mighty naughty gay porn.
All in all, we sold very well considering no one knew vendors were within screaming distance of the stage. Will we all be there again next year? Who knows?
But Lalaland is the best and worst of everything!
Bumping into Jeff Olson and Rick Sparks while we looked over a menu for a restaurant, ogling lovely pretty boys in and out of Starbucks-
hanging with a group of the best people on the planet? Well, what can I say? Priceless.
The City of Angels...yes, I think I'll keep her.
Be safe-

The Good, the Bad, and the Zealots

2011-09-25T20:23:00.000-07:00

Try as I might I can never understand those who make it their mission in life to seek out other's lives and choose what they censor. There are things in life I do not like. I do not like horror films where women are mutilated and raped. I do not like violent films where the main purpose of a film is to scare by blood and gore. I do not like films that depict cops being shot in cold blood...So, because I am a free person with choices, I choose not to go to see those movies. I don't look up websites that may show horror film clips. I don't choose to go to places these horrible images are shown.
I have choices.
On social networks I also have choices. I do not choose to friend anyone who thinks the Bible is fact, or that Jesus is their best friend. That is my choice. I choose not to accept requests from authors who write books which I may find offensive. Yet I am not so pig-headed that I think my views and choices should violate their freedom to post what they please to like-minded individuals. With a click of the mouse I can delete them. Not their photos, their pages, their work. Just our connection.
Just as we can change a channel on the TV or not go to a movie, we can also choose to not associate with individuals we do not share ideology with. Common sense will show that if you do not associate with people who do not share your views, you may be less likely to be offended.
So it begs an answer.
Why do some individuals feel it is their job to censor others? It's simply not. If something offends you, don't seek it out.
There are some things that offend everyone, of course, but I know there are people who like to watch violent movies. I don't agree. I think they are a bane of humanity, since I have been a cop and seen the violence as reality, and not Hollywood make up. But there are many movies made where torture, rape and murder qualify as entertainment. Whatever.
But the human body? Male bodies being reported as obscene? I beg to differ, and I know many admirers of men will as well.
I have a suggestion. If photos of handsome men upset you, why do you seek them out? How about you go and get a life, watch your violence, and your Bible films, and leave hard working people the hell alone.
Be safe out there.

The Meaning of Life

2011-09-15T19:06:00.000-07:00

Lately...oh, all right, always...
I ponder the meaning of life...why we are here, who we are, what do we have to do with anything anyway?
I know I'm not alone. The popularity of ghost hunter shows, paranormal groups, psychics...to name a few, lead me to believe people are looking for...something. What? The meaning of life? The comfort of another life? Another existence, another plane? Who were we?
Were we someone in a past life? Will we be someone in another life? Do You believe?
I think as a writer some of us lean to a particular theme. Historical? Vampire? Cowboy? Ever wonder why you're drawn to a certain thing? Do any of you female authors feel like men in women's bodies? Tendency to love the idea of men with men? Ever ask why? Were you a man in a previous life? A cowboy in a rodeo? A soldier in a past war?
Well, perhaps I was a Roman soldier in love with my fellow warrior. I don't know. But lately, thinking about women writing gay love stories, I do wonder. Why are we drawn to this genre? Why is our passion to write this kind of book so extreme?
Many people can't figure out why we do what we do. The number of times I am asked why on earth I write such...er...smut...is too numerous to count.
My answer?
Because I must. I must write this. I am now so passionate about this writing I couldn't survive without it. And I know! I know! My fellow woman authors could not either. It is their calling- their great yearning. And judging by the amount of new authors springing up like weeds all over gay male romance, my guess is we are not alone.
The meaning of life to me is to grow to be who I am in my best capacity. To show love to others, to teach tolerance and fight ignorance. Life to me is to let others who do not comprehend same sex attraction know that love is never wrong no matter the form. It's my credo.
In a day when hate is so thick we can barely see through its smog, authors who write about romance and love are the shining beacon.
We are not alone. We all are here for the same reason, to show love of two people is a wonderful, and yes, a sexy thing.
Were we men in a previous life? We can dream, can't we? I can go back to my past lives and see myself as a big strapping Roman soldier, making passionate love to his fellow man. Sure, why not? That's what fiction is all about.
Or...is it perhaps not fiction at all? You be the judge.
Be safe.

Facebook Now an Extreme Right Wing Supporter

2011-09-03T08:05:00.001-07:00

Mark Zuckerberg, do you know what your employees are doing??

Dear Mr Zuckerberg,
Your Facebook censors have waged a war on homosexuals. Gay romance authors who use Facebook to connect to buyers, fans and other authors, are being targeted by the right wing conservative groups, and your employees are backing and empowering them. Did you know that? Perhaps you heard about the gay kiss being removed from your site for being obscene recently? Or perhaps you don't know. Covers with two men on them, never showing genitalia, are being reported by the religious right as obscene and your minions are deleting the covers, even though they do not qualify for removal according to your own Facebook rules. Your employees are removing gay romance book covers and other gay pictures, simply because of pressure exerted by the far right. Or worse, your employees are biased and gladly delete things they find 'offensive'. I find hate groups offensive, Mr. Zuckerberg, yet Facebook allows them to thrive. Though hundreds of people report them as hate propaganda, your censors do not remove them. Why not?
Do you know how they are making you look, sir? Ever wonder why Facebook is losing members? Dropping in popularity?
Hate groups thrive, and hard working authors who happen to write gay romance, are being censored and victimized. Are you aware of that? No, I didn't think so. But you will become aware. Sooner or later this will get out to the media and the gay rights organizations and you will be called upon to answer to why. Why you allowed this type of blatant homophobia thrive in the social network you created.
Our cover designs are simply of men. That's all. But showing a male torso in a picture with another man has become 'obscene' to your censors. Perhaps, Mr Zuckerberg, you should be more involved in your company. They are making you look like an ignorant homophone. Just thought you should know.

Lights! Camera! Action! Series!

2011-08-28T18:37:00.000-07:00

Well, I finished Happy Endings, Lancelot in Love, The Crush, and now I can get back to the business of my Action! men. I love how Mark and the gang have somehow gotten into the hearts and minds of my readers. They want to know what those guys are up to next.
I have to admit when I created Mark and Jack nearly fifteen years ago, I never thought those men would see the light of published day, let alone have a fan club. But I guess my love of Mark and Jack have given pleasure to my readers. A very nice thing indeed.
Another wonderful fact is that my readers are not only excited to read another installment they are giving me fabulous Action! ideas.
One of my favorite ladies, Judie Stewart, loved the idea of Alex and Billy in love. So did I, Judie! And your wish for them to become a loving couple was mine as well. How incredible for me to get inspired by my fans.
Another great fan I've recently met is Stacie Lindsay. Stacie suggested Jack Larsen take his turn as a bottom boy. Love it! Yes, indeed, Stacie, I think it's time for the mighty He-man to get his wish, and yours.
How much do I love the feedback of my fans? I love it. Not only do they inspire me, they get to see the men they have come to enjoy get it exactly as they want it. I don't know any author I can email and ask them to change a story to my liking. I have to tell you how happy I am to accommodate many of my readers. So many wanted to know about Angel's new man, you got it! Get more rough in my BDSM scenes with Mark, why not? 'Too vanilla' I believe one fan said. Okay, let's get 'down and dirty' with Mark. Maybe he is ready for some rough sex now. Who knows?
All I do know, is having the fans love Mark and the gang has made my day- well, my year!
Those men are a part of me, especially Mark Antonious. He is my alter-ego and I suppose all authors put a little bit of themselves in all their characters. Believe me, Mark is me in many ways, but I don't have three husband/minders watching my ass!
Maybe in my next life I will be the infamous Mark Antonious Richfield, but how much fun for an author is it to play interactive writing with her fans.
Thank you to all of you who love and follow Mark and Alex and the guys, and for giving me outstanding directions for those men to go.

Chapter 1

Jack moaned and tugged at the leather around his wrists. He was facing a cement wall and bound to four hooks, making him spread eagle, naked and exposed.
Something cool and slick was pushing into his back passage.
“How’s that, He-man?”
“God!” he said, clenching his jaw.
“Getting you ready for me.”
“No. Mark…you’re too big.”
“You know you want it.”
“Mark, I said no.”
“Oh, Jackie-blue…no one says no to me.”
Jack balled up his fists as Mark entered him, slow and deep. Mark’s breath brushed against his neck, his hands ran up Jack’s arms to his wrists. “Tell me how much you love me fucking you, Jack.”
“I love you fucking me.” Jack groaned in pain as if he were being split open.
“I haven’t even pushed half my cock into you.”
“Mark! God! You’re too big!” Jack tugged at the black leather cuffs seeing the bolts pull from the wall from his strength.
“Tell me how much you want me to fuck you, He-man.”

(okay, it's a rough, but you get the idea) Thank you, Stacie-
Book 10 -Having it All! will be released early 2012

Be safe out there everyone.

You Are What You Do!!

2011-08-16T16:11:00.000-07:00

Back from another trip to LaLa land and once again reflecting on everything from the drive, to the signing event, to the great people I have come to know.

Do I love LA? Yes, indeed! I have no idea why, but everything about that crazy place makes me smile. The palm trees lining the avenues, the tacky facades of the restaurants and tattoo shops, the mix of people walking around...what's not to love?

Los Angeles. Wonderful.

My thoughts turned next to the people who I can count on. And luckily they are many. Firstly, my two favorite authors, Kage Alan and Patricia Logan. They say they will be there, and well, they were. No doubt whatsoever. These two would drive over nails to get where they needed to be. They are just that kind of people. The kind you can count on. The one's who will be there because, they said they would.
Not only were they there, they were so hilarious, I was laughing the entire time. Seeing Patricia and Kage was like a stage act with two crazy comedians. Too funny to be true. Needless to say, a friendship between those two authors was born. I just need to raise them properly. How many times did I say, "Children behave or I shall stop this car!" Too damn funny.

My author friends- Perfection.

My cover models...dear oh dear. Here we have men who not only are not true to their promises, they reek of narcissism and ego. But of course models are known for that. But there are exceptions. Jeff Olson. I can't say enough about him. Rick Sparks, his partner, is another amazing man. When they say they are going to be there, they are. Not only do they show, they make the atmosphere a party, invite their friends to show support and go above and beyond. Now that's my kind of man. They are the stuff of my novels, and ironically, Jeff was the inspiration for Elliot Downey in Mr. Right. Indeed, Jeff and Rick are the perfect heroes for my novels. Steadfast, true and reliable. What more could an author want?
And Andrew McLaren, a newcomer to the model world, also made it. Another man true to his word.

What can I say about people who don't care about others? Nothing. But...YOU ARE WHAT YOU DO. In a world of networking, helping others, people who make promises they don't keep will certainly find out this type of behavior burns bridges. I fully understand if someone cannot show for an event. Just say, 'Nope, can't do it.' Fair enough. But to say you will? And don't show? Very bad indeed.

Anyone who reads my blogs or books, knows I am a believer in Karma. She's always got my back. I trust in her. And in an effort of giving back to Karma for the wonderful support from Jeff Olson, please check out his and Leon Accord's new web-series Old Dogs & New Tricks. It's too good for words and you need to see it, and help keep this series going. They have made a friend in me for life. And anything I can give, do or say to promote them I will do.

LaLa Land...what a wonderful place to be and I will be back again for the WeHo bookfair with wonderful Kage Alan, Micheal Perronne and a host of authors. During that stay I will again see all the dear friends I have made in that City of Angels.

Men who keep their word? Priceless!!

Be safe out there. The world is full of trouble.

When Karma Smiles

2011-08-07T20:57:00.000-07:00

Life is a funny thing.
Good deeds come unexpectedly and sometimes bad ones as well.
I'm a believer in trying to do what's best for peace of mind, and hopefully that includes helping others, being accessible to novice writers, and always answering my emails. Little things, yes, but what it means is that I care about a person's time and feelings.
In a day when communication brings people lap to lap at fingertips, what excuse do we have to not say hi back, or hi first? None. No longer is there a reason for losing touch, yet people still do. The effort for some to email back or be kind is still rare.
We are a product of our upbringing and environment. Our behavior is who we are.
As a writer of gay erotic fiction, I get many questions as to why I write what I write. I answered that in many ways. An example would be, women like to read about men together, how sexy it is...that kind of thing. But as I reach the 70 novel mile mark I have come to think more about what I do every year.
Yes, I am in the adult entertainment business. I admit that. But- I know in my heart my reasons are much deeper. Is it too much to ask for people to live and let live. I didn't invent that quote, believe me, you all know that. But no one seems to believe it or practice it.
Live and Let Live.
My novels are about men in love who want to love other men, to marry, and to be free to be themselves.
In my world as a gay romance writer, I had the pleasure of meeting Scott Hall who is the founder of Gay American Heroes. This man is trying hard to get humanity to recognise the toll our GLBT community is taking at the hands of violent offenders. Scott is someone who gives without thought of gain. More people should be the kind of advocate Scott has become. But passion and empathy are mandatory if you want to be like Scott. Without it, you become a narcissist who thinks of only yourself.

Where am I going with this?
Karma smiling. In giving to Scott's foundation with proceeds from Unnecessary Roughness, a novel about gay violence on a college campus, Scott has given to me. He has given me photographers, models, and a friendship.
Guess what people? Giving, kindness, being open to fans and making good friends by taking the time to respond to them openly makes you a better human being.
In a world of so much death and sorrow, how hard is it for one individual to say a nice thing or offer help?
Remember the next time you ignore a person's fan mail, or cut a fellow author to shreds in a review, or gossip behind people's backs to make yourself feel better...remember a lesson from me, someone who never thought she'd make so many goddamn amazing friends- that Karma is not only smiling at me, she's patting me on the back.
Through my books my fans have become friends. Real friends. And no matter how long I continue to write, or hang around on this crazy planet, I will always appreciate them and Karma for her generosity.

Be safe, be kind...and give of yourself.

Mr. Right ? Or Mr. Can't?

2011-07-11T12:54:00.000-07:00

It occurred to me while writing this novel how odd it is that some professions do not 'allow' love to occur. But, inevitably love finds a way anyway. We seem to believe we have control over our attraction to individuals, and that the laws of nature can be contained.
WRONG!
Let me tell you, love happens. It may not be convenient, it may not be the right time, but it makes the world go round and round.
Falling in love is such a random happening and if you are one of the lucky ones you'll find that simply- mad love- that is all consuming and you know in your heart (and groin) you will never find another like it. Yes, yours truly had such a love, and forever all other lovers will be destined to be compared to him. Sorry, love sucks, then you die. Or no, wait a minute, love doesn't suck after all.
We connect with certain individuals with so much intensity at times, it consumes us. I'm not talking stalking here, people, so don't get the wrong idea. But true, deep overwhelming love, makes you yearn to touch and think about your lover to near insanity. I have had the ultimate pleasure of being connected to my perfect love for hours, all day, just uniting as one, lazing the day away, in a constant state of blissful arousal. Sound impossible? The stuff of stories? No. Reality. Few find this kind of bond, but when you do, it's something to write about.

So, back to the idea of a profession deciding on putting the kibosh on love. Let me tell you something, good luck with that.
When something is forbidden, how much hotter is it? Lots hotter! And we all know that shrinks and their patients do very dirty things together, as do doctors and theirs, lawyers and their clients, you know the drill.

Love- my dearest readers, will find a way. Go ahead and try to prevent it, make laws to stop same sex marriages, cry and stomp when someone happens to fall madly in love with the forbidden fruit, but you won't stop it.

That pesky emotion that never fails to make us soar or send us into the dumps, love will be around as long as hate, and thank crud, its a heck of a lot stronger!
Be safe-

Next month my new release will be Mr. Right, with the stunning Jeff P. Olson on the cover. Here's the blurb and sample chapter:

BLURB:

Twenty-five year old Shawn Valley loved the internet chat sites and hooking up with older men. When he met Glenn Avon, a man thirty years his senior, he thought his life had changed for the better and it was time to settle down. What Shawn didn't expect was for Glenn to die after only living with him for three years. On the heels of his partner's death, Shawn begins to slide back into his old habits until he is persuaded to seek counseling.
Elliot Downey worked in Vacaville, California as a therapist. When a woman leaves him a message, asking him to call Shawn Valley to make an appointment, Elliot never expected to become enamored with a patient. It was taboo, it was against the rules, and it was inevitable.
The first few moments Shawn and Elliot were face to face, Elliot knew he was in trouble, and Shawn wondered if he could rebound into a wonderful new man.
Once before Elliot had loved someone and ruined his career. Was history going to repeat itself?
How much is a man willing to risk when he thinks Mr. Right has walked right to the door? It's Shawn's job to convince Elliot, they were meant for each other.

Sample Chapter;

Shawn stood looking out of the back window at his car. He was alone in the waiting room and nervous. His hands were clammy. He kept rubbing them on his white shorts to dry them.
Hearing a noise behind him, Shawn spun around to see Elliot who had just opened the door to call him in. Instant meltdown occurred for Shawn. His entire body burned like a fever.
"I'm ready for you," Elliot said, smiling sweetly.
Seeing Elliot give his crotch a quick glance, Shawn moved one leg in front of the other to force himself to function when all he wanted was this man. The urge to rebound onto Elliot for emotional and physical support was powerful.
"How are you?" Elliot asked, closing the waiting room door and walking with Shawn to his room.
"I don't know." And Shawn didn't. He was totally confused and becoming afraid of making bad decisions.
Elliot closed them into the private space, sitting on his chair, picking up a yellow legal pad and pen.
As Shawn sat on the couch, nudging off his flip-flops, he reassessed the room, as if he had forgotten the details, and it was important not to. The table lamp, the picture of a landscape on the wall behind Elliot, the bookshelf, the window with the sheer curtain, the large wall clock, ticking loudly
Elliot stared at him, as if waiting for more information.
Shawn grew excited at the intense stare of Elliot's bright green eyes.
"What don't you know?" Elliot asked.
"Huh?" Shawn lost himself on the hollow of Elliot's cheek under his angular cheekbone. His soft blond hair and full lips.
"I asked you how you are, and you said, 'I don't know'."
Shawn pushed the heel of his hand into his crotch, taming what was becoming a raging hard-on. He felt dampness and peeked down. A small stain had appeared on his white cotton shorts where he had leak pre-cum.
"Shawn? Are we going to be able to continue these sessions?"
"I'm sorry. I guess I'm feeling a little" Horny? Desperate? Alone? Need to jerk off on you?
Elliot nodded, as if he wanted Shawn to continue.
"I" Shawn bit his bottom lip, picturing Elliot naked.
"You?"
A sudden wash of sadness hit Shawn. His eyes burned and his hands felt very cold and clammy.
"Talk to me," Elliot said, "Shawn, what's going on?"
"I'm not coping with anything well."
"Okay we touched on this in the last session. Tell me what areas in particular are giving you the most trouble?"
"Everything. I told you. Nothing has changed."
Elliot put the pad and pen aside, leaning over his lap to speak seriously. "Grief is very consuming. You lost someone you loved, Shawn. Recovery is going to take time. And everything you do will feel arduous and impossible until you can move on."
Shawn felt his eyes filling, about to overflow. "I can't function."
"I know."
"How do you know?" A drop ran down Shawn's face and he wiped at it.
"I lost someone close to me as well."
"Who?" Shawn figured it was probably Elliot's mom or dad.
Pain washed across Elliot's handsome features. He sat back in the chair and didn't reply.
"Elliot? Who did you lose?"
After rubbing his eyes and face, Elliot said, "My partner."
A jolt of energy hit Shawn. He blinked and more tears ran down his face. "When?"
"A year ago June." Elliot picked up his pen. "But this is about you. I just want you to know I understand."
The fascination Shawn felt was borderline obsessive. A flash of being a kindred spirit to Elliot made the gooseflesh rise on his skin. "How old was he?"
"Shawn"
"Elliot, please."
"Twenty-five. He was killed while riding his motorcycle, in an accident."
Shawn studied Elliot's expression. It didn't take a brain surgeon to see Elliot still felt the pain. "Dodo you like younger men?"
"I can't talk about this with you, Shawn. If we make this about us, I have to refer you to someone else."
"Why?" Shawn began to feel indignant. "What if hearing how you coped with your loss helps me? Huh? What if you sharing your feelings, makes me feel like I'm not the only one who's gone through this?"
It appeared to Shawn as if Elliot was giving it some thought.
"What do you want to know?" Elliot picked up a coffee mug with a rainbow decal on it, and sipped it.
"How long were you two together?"
"Eight years."
Shawn thought about the numbers. "Youyou met him when he was seventeen?"
"Yes."
Though Elliot spoke calmly, Shawn could see the pain course through him. "How old were you then?"
"Twenty-six." He set his mug down.
Shawn didn't know how to feel. His head began to spin with the information. Mainly he was thinking; you lost your boy toy, I lost my sugar daddy. What the fuck? Is this karma? Are you my Mr. Right?

Much ado about Alex

2011-06-12T19:19:00.000-07:00

Alexander Mark Lehman Richfield.

A character from the Action! Series that has created so much controversy…I love it!
Okay, for those of you who don’t know Alex, let me give you his background;

If we are taking Going Wild, Book 9 in the Action! Series for our reference point, twenty-two years ago, Alex’s mother, Iris Johansen had an affair with Mark Antonious Richfield. While Mark was in college at Stanford University, he was still struggling with his sexuality. Mark’s deceased father, Milt Richfield, thought his only son was a disgrace and continued to harass and abuse Mark because Mark appeared to be gay, or at least showed tendencies of leaning that way.
During this troubled time for Mark, he had just finished a brutal battle with his father regarding his sexuality and headed to a strip club near campus. Mark was able to get erect and have sex with Iris, (one of the dancers), by staring at a photo of a Gulf War soldier that Iris had taped to her vanity in the changing room at the club.
After the one night stand Mark soon forgot the incident and Iris.
Eighteen years later, in Behaving Badly, Book 4, Alexander shows up at Mark and Steve Miller’s posh home in Bel Air. Yes, Alex had a chip on his shoulder. But can we blame him?

Alexander never knew his biological father. His mother, Iris kept it secret from him. She married his auto-mechanic step-father while she was pregnant, and Bill Lehman did not like this child from another man. Iris and Bill had a daughter, Amy, and twin sons, Will and Kyle, eight years after Alex was born. While Alex shared a room with his twin siblings, he was constantly verbally abused by the bratty boys. Alex also withstood physical abuse from Bill who was an alcoholic. As Alex matured and his sexual nature emerged Bill Lehman’s anger towards Alex grew to fury and hatred.
Alex spotted an ad in a magazine for Dangereux Cologne. His resemblance to the striking model, Mark Richfield was too strong to ignore. When Mark does a guest spot on Forever Young, and his name appears in the credits, Alex becomes aware of who Mark is. Next, Alex tracked Mark down.

Immediately his reception from Steve is warm and filled with amazement, while Mark panics at the idea he has fathered an unknown offspring and of course, later, Mark deals with Alex’s attraction to Steve and all of Mark’s contemporaries.

Think about Alex for a moment.
A young man growing up in a hostile environment, gay as he can be, and alone to deal with it. Alex has a few contacts for sex as an underage young man, but his confusion and loneliness, not to mention the bullying Alex endures both at home and in school, could have had dire consequences to an adolescent who wasn’t made of tough stuff. Alex is very tough. He’s had to be. And even with the mess of his past, which in no way was his doing, Alex strives to be loved, famous, and successful. His determination, his drive, and of course his pretty face, give Alex the television role of a lifetime. He is the star of the new sexy vampire series Being Screwed. Yet Alex, because he lashes out against his father in frustration, is set up for a lot of ridicule by readers of this series.

Alexander sees his father as perfection. Mark is who Alex wants to be in every way. Mark is the nation’s number one top model, rich, a celebrity, and loved. Loved dearly-by three men in particular; Steve, Adam Lewis, and of course his longtime friend Jack Larsen as ‘husbands’; not to mention, Mark is adored by a very supportive group of gay men he has managed to attract.

Alex has been isolated his whole life, and sees his larger-than-life father as a threat.
But Alex learns his life lessons quickly.

He and Oliver Loveday become friends, and lovers. But Oliver is Alex’s age, and still growing into a man as well. Oliver does not fulfill any of the father-figure-hero worship Alex needs to feel whole.

One man does.

Fiction- yes, this is fiction. Though Alex’s story may be someone’s in reality, and probably many young men who have struggled with coming out, living in their father’s celebrity shadow, and a number of youth inspired issues, Alex has become unpopular with some fans simply because he tempted a man who was in a relationship, to stray.

To keep novels intriguing, authors must create drama. Alex is the ‘drama king’ of several of the Action! Series books. Ever since Alexander showed up at Mark and Steve’s door, he has wreaked havoc and tempted oh so many of Mark’s good friends.

In Going Wild, Alex finds his soul-mate. His one true forever love. And so does the man he falls in love with. Though many of us hope that we find that one in a million the first, or second time we meet someone, sometimes love comes a little later. But when it hits, we know it. Alex knows he has hit the lottery with his new man. And his lover is equally in love and loyal. As far as any romance story I have yet written, Alex and his older man mate- are meant to be more than most.

Maybe as you read this blog, as well as the newest addition to the Action! Series, this July when it is released, you will cut Alex some slack. If he was your son, struggling to find his way in a world turned hostile to homosexuality, growing used to his universal appeal and fame, and suffering all the hardships of any twenty-something to grow and learn, you would find a place in your heart for our crazy Alex.

I know you will be thrilled with the latest in the series and expect great things from the once insecure youth, who has blossomed into an intense young man.

Be safe.

The Secret Society of Women

2011-05-30T17:18:00.000-07:00

The more I write the more amazed I am how people continue to ask me WHY I write what I write. I know I've touched on this topic before, but the book I am now writing, Down and Dirty, which will be released this fall, makes me wonder about it as well.
To be honest, it's the 'dirtiest' book I've written and I wonder if I have become an adrenalin gay erotica junkie. My first few attempts at this genre were timid, slightly shy and well, not nearly as down and dirty as this up and coming...(don't you love that saying?) novel.
Yes, I've had menage, foursomes...older men with younger men, and once did dabble with S&M in Born to Please, which, mind, was the best selling book I've written.
This new book is going completely insane. Here's a sample of what I mean:

When Jean met Harry’s gaze he tried to convey his shock. Harry smiled wickedly, working him with the dildo and tugging on his balls at the same time.
‘Who is he?’ Jean mouthed silently.
‘My brother.’
“What?” Jean choked and Clyde sat up.
“Did I miss something?” Clyde asked.
“No.” Harry grabbed Clyde by the back of his neck and pushed him down to continue.
Jean didn’t know if he could climax. His brain went into overdrive trying to think. I don’t want to think. I want to come.
Relaxing and bringing his focus back to the act, Jean raised his hands over his head and crossed his wrists, imagining he was bound. Harry immediately took notice. He stopped short, leaving the dildo where it was, removed a belt from the dresser and looped it around Jean’s wrists, tightening it.
“Now we’re talking.” Clyde grinned. Clyde sat back, gripped both Jean’s ankles and raised them to meet his wrists. Harry hogtied Jean with the belt.
Jean began panting in his excitement. “Fuck me.”
“I am fucking you.” Harry returned to the dildo.
Clyde pulled Jean’s cock through his thighs so he could still stuck it. Jean bent his knees and straddled so Clyde could continue.
He looked at his bound limbs and a surge of pleasure washed over him. Two men, big rough gods, performing carnal acts on him delighted him.
Clyde rubbed the root of his cock and drew faster suction. The dildo rode over his prostate making his groin burn and tingle.
“Oh, yeah.” Harry chuckled. “He’s riding the edge.”
Jean rocked on his back, into the rhythm of both men. He interlaced his fingers and started to go into an orgasm. While the waves of pleasure began, he met Harry’s steely gaze.
“Come, you cocksucker.”

You see? I'm completely out of control. So I ask, hmmm...is it just me?
No. There is a 'secret society of women' all going wild over this kind of kink. Don't ask me, I didn't know about it either, until recently. Good ol' FB...yup. I was privately invited to the party. And wow! Talk about stimulating! I'm not the worst one! There are some wonderful women out there, living ordinary lives with their hubbies and kiddies, going mad for men on men kink! There's a whole army of us just under the periphery giggling, licking our chops, and loving every dirty minute of it.
Men have forever had straight porn, straight mags with enough T&A to choke a horse. Women? I've discussed this before. We're downright oppressed because some members of society don't think women should get off on men...and particularly men with men. I got a news flash for ya, bimbo. We do! Oh, boy do we!!! What can I say but my sisters in erotica have opened even my shy eyes up to men, men, men. Oh, did I say? MEN! We've been set free to smile and make yummy commentaries about the pretty pictures we share. I don't know how else to describe it but it's liberating. We all share the same love of men. And we are growing unashamed to say it.

Thank you gals for bringing me to the secret society of women, women who love gay erotica...and like it down and dirty!!!

be safe.

Bitches We Love to Hate

2011-05-13T12:52:00.001-07:00

Susan Lucci, Karen Walker (aka Megan Mullally), Kathy Griffin, Betty White and Wendie Malick in Hot in Cleveland, and let's not forget Joan Collins...

There are woman who gain popularity by their bitchiness. They act horribly, selfishly, and seem to thrive on treating others like crapola, yet people love them. Their fans repeat their snappy quotes at parties and set them up as camp heroes.

Why am I listing females who wouldn't be considered sweet? Because along with hot men, I have been known to write about...well, bitches. They are among us. We've all met one or two...or ten. Now, don't get me wrong. Men are equally nasty, though 'bitch' is reserved for the female of the species...

Yet...there is a double standard for bitches in books. Or at least my books. I have to say, when I am once again called on the carpet for writing about a nasty woman, I laugh. It's precisely the plan. You see, if I make the woman who the man leaves, nice, think of the abuse I would suffer at the hands of the critics. "How could she write about a man leaving a woman so nice?" "Why did that man take that wonderful woman's boyfriend?"

You see the dilemma?

We can forgive a man for deserting a nasty woman. But if the same man left his sweet, caring one in a novel? Hugely unpopular idea.

So, in comes the wicked woman. Or if not wicked, perhaps not likable. Enter Trina, my new lead female character in My Best Friend's Boyfriend. Well, first of all she's based on a real person. My close friend. Yes, she's real. And with all her faults she is wonderful.

But Trina has to be annoying, she has to be the type of woman you can't feel sorry for in a novel. If you did, how angry would you be at the author for betraying her?

It's a sticky issue for an author. But I should think by now anyone who knows my novels can predict the bitch will show her ugly head. In my life, I have come across some very scary people. And the worst ones, while in the police and out of it, were women. Sorry to say it.

On a different note, I would also like to say, women have also been close friends, not-nasty, and staunch supporters of me and my career. Of course there are both nice and nasty men and woman. It's silly to even make a distinction.

What can I say? I do enjoy writing about my wily women, even though yes! You want to punch them! Slap them! Kick 'em in the butt! I love it. I have done my job.

Be safe out there.

Enough censorship!!

2011-04-27T15:01:00.000-07:00

I don't know if any of you ever watched Lewis Black the political comedian, but at times, poor Lewis appears to be on the verge of exploding and has to calm down before he loses a lung ranting about things that he shouldn't have to even be frustrated with because they are so stupid. Picture me as Lewis Black about to scream profanities as I rail at things that don't make sense.
Censorship.
Lately several authors of gay romance novels have had their accounts monitored, censored and deleted by Facebook. Only because of MALE pictures. I have been on this tirade before. I stomp my feet and ball up my fists because of the inequity of ratio of male to female nudity in the media. A straight female must look for her amusement on gay websites because, god-forbid the precious male penis makes a cameo appearance anywhere else.
I thought censorship had died with free speech and civil rights. Wrong, Hauser. Not going to happen.
Some things offend even the most liberal of minds. I'm not talking about that. But when simply showing a male derriere is considered 'obscene'? How far have we come? Who thinks men naked is offensive? Male bodies are a thing of intense beauty. Just ask the Greeks, Romans, and how about Michelangelo for that matter.
I suppose we are used to female bodies being objectified, Lord knows we see it often enough. Full frontal female nudity has become so common, obviously it's not noticed by the censor-thumpers. Perhaps they should nix the double standard.
Beautiful men will not go away simply because you are not one of them.
Gorgeous male physiques will not become unappealing simply because you are afraid of them.
Women and gay men will not stop looking at pictures of pretty boys, simply because you disapprove.
What censorship on Facebook, Myspace, and any place else that claims to be a 'public' forum, will only make people dislike their sites.
Again, I am not talking truly offensive posts here. After all, Facebook allows hate groups of all kinds to linger, antisemitism, homophobes...who knows what else? I don't go to those sites because the don't interest me. Perhaps the people who do not like pretty naked men should just stop looking for them 'intentionally' just so they can hit the 'report' button and annoy a hard working author.
Nothing is sacred, not book covers, naked torsos of men, nothing. It seems someone thinks all this can be wiped out with a single mouse click.
I have news for whoever thinks they can 'clean up' the web. You can't. All you do is waste everyone's time. We love men. We will continue to admire male bodies the way the female body has been ogled on the net since its inception.

For those of us who admire male beauty, take heart. Just because a few ignorant bastards cannot handle being compared to utter perfection, we will continue to view our lovely men whether they like it or not.

In other words, GET A LIFE!!

Be safe out there.

The Phenomena of the Wolf...man...

2011-04-03T15:39:00.000-07:00

Even as a young person I have always been fascinated by the wolf. I used to head to the Fair Lawn Library on Fair Lawn Ave and order hardbound non-fiction books written about wolf culture, wolf habitat, and wolf ecology. A longtime lover of animals, including anti-fur protesting in NYC in my wild college days, the wolf in particular was always a fascination of mine.
In college I was lucky enough to be part of a wolf program in which a man brought a 'tame' timber wolf to schools to show they are not as fearsome as fairy tales made them out to be, and indeed, Wolves have always gotten a pretty bad rap.
The auditorium was full and we all howled together trying to get this huge animal inspired enough to join us. When he did, his singing was so beautiful it brought tears to my eyes.
I headed next to Isle Royal, MI. A small island in Lake Superior known for it's wolf/moose population. I was there to see a wolf in the wild. Never did. The big bad wolf was terrified of humans. Who could blame it. I spotted its footprints, heard it bay at the moon, but canis lupis never showed himself to me.
In my 'den' is a 3 foot by 3 foot painting of a wolf, which I did in college. It was originally purchased by an editor of a newspaper in NY because he wanted it to intimidate people who came into his office. When the newspaper sold, he gave me back my painting. A win/win if ever I should think.
Now the wolf phenomenon has hit an all time high. Wolf men are no longer the nasty weirdos like Lon Chaney, nor the nearly comic roles played by Michael Landon and Micheal J. Fox. To romance writers and readers, and movie fans, the wolfman...has gotten a bit of a sexy upgrade.
He's the new 'vampire' of sexy horror. Women swoon over their shape-shifting wolfmen and love True Blood, Being Human and the Twilight Saga. Just put the word 'wolfman' into your search engine. The number of movies will amaze you. But contemporary wolfmen are the new sexy hunks of the big and small screen, and did I mention fiction? The shape-shifter from wolf to man is all the rage. Yes, I too have succumbed and though my next release is my first shape-shifter, and well, I may not know all the 'rules' I loved writing it. The characters became sensual and limitless, like the real timber wolf itself.
Of course in reality, we hunt the poor wolf from helicopters, trap them as vermin, and to be honest have some notion of bringing them to the brink of extinction because....well, I never did know why. I won't go into my strong abhorrence to the murder of wild wolves, let's just say they are a necessary part of nature's ecosystem which man has continually ignored or destroyed.

Wolves...the last outcasts? Trapped for parka hood trim? Misunderstood? Sounds slightly like life imitating fiction. Romance too writes about the misunderstood wolfman. But we love them so much. Maybe some of our fascination will turn to compassion for an animal who has sincerely had a hard ride from mankind.

Be safe out there.

Sex and the Human Being

2011-03-20T20:37:00.000-07:00

Erotic stories certainly have sex-appeal...perhaps that's their point.
Sex in our 'modern' world comes in all shapes and sizes...quite literally.
Sex appeal, sexual preference, threesomes/menage, as well as- love-lust-wow do that again!
But that physical act of the most intimate kind, can cause the downfall of marriages, political careers, jail time, and a host of nasty bugs. Sex has become the bane and triumph of our society and the human race on the whole. Even bible wavers and right wing extremists want sex for procreation only. It seems sex is on everyone's mind and sex is a multi-million if not multi-billion dollar industry.
Erotic novels tend to draw us into a fantasy where sex is not just the point, but a means to an end. Seduction, infatuation, attraction...flirting, and then, of course comes the kiss...just the beginning of the wonderful act of coupling that bonds some people for life, or at least creates an intimacy with another person which cannot be underestimated.
Of course sex has a very dark side. Sexual deviation, sexual predators, non-consensual sex...the seamier side of humankind is not something many, if any, romance writer thinks is acceptable. There's nothing sexy about it.
But in my career as a cop, and now an erotic author, I know sex plays a huge part in our life, thoughts, dreams, and well...ask Freud. Sex is the center of our behavior even as very young adults. Our curiosity begins at a young age, and never leaves us.
I know this because of the women who buy romances about two men. About my own attraction to the sexuality of two hunks grinding. Forget men wanting to see two women together. That's an old story and not news to anyone. But how shocked people are to find out women make up a large part of my fan base. Another large part of erotica that is a good market, threesomes. Two men and one women, three men...women really enjoy this.
I can't say how happy I am to see women finally getting a voice to what turns them on. Men have had sexual outlets and porn in their favor for generations. For women, it's slim pickings. We don't have millions of strip clubs, a plethora of magazines with gorgeous young naked male bodies, and it seems lately, when man on man romance authors post handsome men on their sites, they get censored, particularly by Facebook (who allow anti-gay sites, but that's for another blog).
Don't even get me started on the inequity of naked men vs naked women in the media. It's pathetic. For a woman to enjoy male bodies we have to search gay male websites. And we do.
Men and women aren't so different. We all want the same thing. And through my experience in life, I have come to understand that men do have committed relationships with other men, and the stereotypes about men being promiscuous is just that, a stereotype. My dear readers, women cheat on their spouses and have loads of sex as well.
Sex is taboo yet everyone wants it. It's where we connect with a loved one on a level that is deep and believe me, it's what we want to read about. The genre of gay erotica has exploded. Ten years ago I couldn't find a gay romance that satisfied my craving to read it. Thankfully now there are many.
Here's the rub. In the world of novels we have come a long way.
But why have we taken backwards steps when it comes to love and marriage between same sex couples?
Sex- that three letter word that terrifies censors, far right religious leaders, and parents of teenage kids.
Perhaps we should get over it. Get over our taboo and stigma about loving, consensual sex between two adoring adults.
It occurs to me there are bigger problems to deal with in the world, spend money on, and rant and rave in political forums instead of keeping people from showing their love in marriage.

Sex.
Such a little word that causes so much controversy. I suppose in a small way, I hope to break the sexual mores we seem to constantly deal with in society.
It's just an act between two lovers. And for many, it's a world of fantasy where we can be and dream our wildest desires. The mighty fiction novel. What would the world of love and sex be without it?

Be safe out there...and believe in yourself and your rights to live the life you choose.

Heroes- Part II

2011-03-15T20:49:00.000-07:00

Growing up in New Joisey I had my own ideas of what heroes were. Are.
I became a cop for that reason. How cool would it be to swoop in and help the helpless, save the weak, catch the bad guys. I soon learned that that was an ideal childhood version of what men (or women) in blue did. I found out we were part hero, part villain, part gun-nut, part egomaniac, part nursemaid...you get the idea. Cops are a little bit of everything. But- no matter how long I am out of uniform, I will always feel a close bond for police officers all over the world. I know the job they do. I've walked in their shoes, (or my shoes, actually) and can say -been there-done that.

As a writer I know certain jobs have major sex appeal. After all, the new hero is a cowboy. Or was that last week? Maybe it's a blood-sucking vamp or a wolf shape-shifter. Lord knows a good writer can make any creature sexy...or can we?

I've thought about every profession for my characters; doctors, lawyers, strippers, agents and their models and actor clients, rich playboys, stock brokers...well, the list goes on and on. But what attributes make an attractive hero in a novel? I don't know of anyone putting a hot dentist on their cover, or perhaps a tailor? Maybe an unemployed street person?
Yes...well, can't anyone be a hero? Sure they could.
New heroes appear in novels all the time. The soft spoken accountant, the college administrator, read my novels. There they are. Do they jump into burning buildings to rescue babies? My firemen do, but my other heroes? No. Move faster than a speeding bullet? Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound?
They don't have to.
What makes a man a hero in a GA Hauser novel?
Many things. They can be just wonderful sweet souls, honest, caring, hard workers... or maybe they have compassion for people who need support. They are the strong back for their lovers and friends when they fail.
It's the stuff men are made of inside. Any hero can be flawed. Each comic strip caped crusader has something to hide, right? Otherwise, why the mask? Hmm...hey super-hero, what's behind that tight costume and hood of yours? (In my novels you get to find out!)
Heroes in future Hauser novels can be lineman for power companies, psychiatrists who are devoted to their patients, men who work as paper pushers, computer geeks, carpenters, mechanics...
A real hero is someone who cares about others. Is kind. Loving. Empathetic to people's pain.
You don't need a cape to be a hero. You just need a heart.

Be safe out there.

CHEATING!!

2011-03-04T16:07:00.000-08:00

Hello boys and girls.
Now that I have your attention, let me bring up a topic that instantly got me 'fan' reviews and emails. CHEATING!
First and foremost, I want to remind everyone I write fiction. Fiction: Dictionary definition being: An imaginative creation or a pretense that does not represent actuality but has been invented

That fact is constantly lost on people. Fiction. Make believe, pretending, a creation that does not represent actuality.

I think this is a hard concept for some readers to grasp. They yell at me for bad behavior that my characters have done. Well, email 'yell'. Lots of capital letters and exclamation marks. That kind of yelling.

I always test boundaries in my work. For those of you not familiar with the GA Hauser universe, beware. I push the limits at times. And I have pushed more buttons in Book 8 of the Action! Series...Something Sexy.

Oh My!! A character who is very needy, been abused, and is overwhelmed by his sudden rise to super-stardom, gets 'friendly' with a man he has always wanted, loved, and admired.
Well...this friend is part of a committed couple, in my book. In a world of fiction. And everyone knows in real life, no one cheats! Cough...cough, wink, wink...nod, you get the idea.

So that brings me back to the very concept of 'cheating'. It's almost redundant to explain the reality of wandering fingers and trouser snakes. To explain how cheating has become very popular in all walks of life; tests, resumes, casinos...
But when it comes to affairs of the heart, cheating is certainly at its worst. But OH! it makes for such wonderful drama in FICTION. Sorry, I can't help but shout that word. Can you imagine someone so sheltered they grow furious with characters from a novel? I wish I had time to stomp and ball up my fists over make believe. Alas, real life gets in the way.

If cheating on one's partner, in a novel, which is make believe, makes you upset, burn paperbacks, or delete files, then you need a hobby.

Anyone who knows my work, already prepares themselves for a dose of OMG! she didn't! Yeah, she did. I always do. I always will. If you love make believe, and characters who are badly behaved, downright dirty, you will love my work. If you can't handle the reality of cheating even in a novel form, then be forewarned.

I do adore my men...in life and in fiction. They are wonderful and horrible, and that's what makes humans so interesting and complex. They don't live perfect lives, don't have perfect families, and don't have perfect relationships. Hmm, maybe they are reality.

For the rest of you who want to see what on earth happened to Alexander Richfield in Book 8...then be my guest. Have a good look. Alex is one of my favorites. He's sweet as sugar, seriously insecure, and living his his father (Mark Richfield's) shadow. He's had fame thrust upon him at twenty-two, and is an out gay male, struggling to cope with life with his natural father. For anyone who judges him, I pity their own offspring.

That's enough said on the topic. To all of you who read the book, enjoy. And for those of you who don't understand the meaning of cheating in fiction...
Do you know where your partner is right now??
;)
Be safe...

Interview with Mark Richfield Part 2

2011-02-26T10:21:00.000-08:00

I was able to make an appointment for a second interview with the very busy, yet constantly glamorous, Mark Antonious Richfield. I am once again at Mark’s office building in downtown LA at Parsons and Company, where Mark works as an advertising executive with his husband, the ex LAPD cop, Steve Miller.
With my miniature tape recorder in hand, I rode the elevator to the top floor, feeling butterflies in my stomach. No matter how many times I’ve spoken to Mark over the phone, nothing prepares me for the pure animal magnetism this man possesses.
After telling the receptionist who I was and about my meeting with Mark, I was shown into the same small lounge where we had our first interview. It didn’t take long for Mark to arrive. I was stunned to get a peck on the cheek, (well, I nearly passed out to be honest). That trademark cologne scent was enough to make me swoon on its own.
Of course this delicious hunk was wearing a shimmering black Brioni suit and Manola Blahnick shoes. The urge to run my hands up his body and into his hair was almost too hard to resist.
We sat together on a leather sofa.

Mark: So good to see you again, Ms. Hauser.

GA: Good to see you too. Thanks for saying ‘yes’ to our second interview.

Mark: My pleasure.

GA: Well…so much has happened in so short of time, I don’t know where to begin.

Mark: You always figure something out.

GA: It’s a struggle. Being in the same room with you is incredibly distracting.

Mark: Don’t get carried away already.

GA: I can’t help it. Okay. I’ll behave. Where was I?

Mark: (Laughs) You didn’t know where to begin.

GA: Yes. Right. So, Alexander, your son, is a big star now on the late night cable drama Being Screwed?

Mark: Yes. He’s going a bit mad trying to deal with all the fame at once. Perhaps one day he’ll be sitting with you giving an interview.

GA: Maybe. But he’s not you, believe me.

Mark: That’s what I’m told. But at twenty-two he’s got a lot to learn.

GA: I have faith in him. After all he’s got you.

Mark: I’m hardly a role model. I’m hoping Steven will be the influence Alexander needs to keep in line.

GA: Tell me about your trip to London.

Mark: It was a nightmare and a fantasy. I won’t go into details.

GA: No details? That’s mean. All my readers want is details. They want to know everything about you.

Mark: I’m a bore.

GA: Sure, Mark. That’s why you’re the number one male model in the nation.

Mark: I’m convinced the statistics are over-blown. I did however see my ad for Dangereux Cologne whilst in London. I was bloody everywhere.

GA: Did you and Steve have a good time at your mother, Leslie’s wedding?

Mark: I wouldn’t call the wedding fun. No. But Steven and I did go to a fetish club. Do you know what that is, Ms. Hauser?

GA: Uh…(sweat breaks out on my forehead) Yes.

Mark: Yes?

GA: Details. I want details. What did you wear? What did you do? Did Steve spank you?

Mark: (laughs shyly) I do adore you, you tiny little thing. There’s so much packed into you, I think one day you’ll explode.

GA: Thinking of you in a fetish club with Steve spanking you, is making me explode.

Mark: Naughty, naughty! (wags his finger)

GA: When did it get so hot in here? (fanning myself)

Mark: And I haven’t even shared the details. What would you do if you knew?

GA: Oh God. You’re the worst tease.

Mark: So I’ve heard. But not so much from women. (winks)

GA: One snippet about your fetish experience. Please. I assume it was a BDSM club.

Mark: You assume correctly.

GA: (I wriggle in excitement) And? Well?

Mark: (smiles) Let’s just say that Steven is the master of all my domain.

GA: I am forever jealous of that man.

Mark: He’s here today. I can get him in on this interview.

GA: If Steve comes into this room I’m going to beg you boys to kiss.

Mark: Kiss? Did you say you want to watch Steven and I kiss?

GA: Wow, seriously, did they turn the heat up? I’m dyin’ here.

Mark: Hang on. (Mark stands and opens the door. He speaks but I can’t hear him.)

GA: Am I keeping you?

Mark: No. Not in the least.

(Steve Miller pokes his head into the room): Yes?

Mark: You have a minute, Steven?

Steve Miller: Sure.

GA: Oh, my God. Hi, Steve.

Steve Miller: Nice to finally meet you.

GA: You lucky SOB.

Steve Miller: (to Mark) What did she say?

Mark: Ms. Hauser?

GA: Yes, Mark.

Mark: Are you lost inside your head? Fantasizing about us again?

GA: Hell yeah.

Steve Miller: (laughing softly) You did warn me about her, Mark.

Mark: (wags his finger at me again.) Naughty, naughty.

GA: (I clear my throat) So? I have to wait to hear about what you two did together in London at a fetish club? Seriously?

Mark: (to Steve) Can we give her a preview, Steven?

Steve Miller: Sure.

(Mark and Steve kiss)

GA: Holy crap.

Mark: Will that hold you, love?

(Both Steve and I say): Yes.

Steve Miller: I have to get back to work. Nice meeting you.

GA: You too, Steve.

Mark: To be honest, Ms. Hauser, I don’t think you can handle seeing me and Steven together, in the flesh.

GA: Try me.

Mark: Perhaps one day we’ll make a video and you can review it.

GA: Yes. Please. And don’t forget to include Jack Larsen and Adam Lewis. Those two men have a ton of fans.

Mark: I would never disappoint you, or my fans.

GA: What can I say? (I reach out to shake Mark’s hand) You get better and better every time we meet.

Mark: Flattery will get you everywhere.

GA: Augh! Don’t say things like that!

Mark: Give us a kiss, love.

GA: (I attach myself to Mark for a good sniff and hug.) Wow.

Mark: Be a good girl and don’t get naughty.

GA: I need the two firemen, Blake Hughes and Hunter Rasmussen to hose me down.

Mark: (laughs) Yes. You do!

GA: Thank you so much for the interview. I’m sure my readers are anticipating knowing what you and Steve did in London.

Mark: Hopefully they’ll think it’s Something Sexy.

GA: Believe me, they will! Bye, Mark.

Mark: Bye, Ms. Hauser

The Power of Words

2011-01-09T18:50:00.000-08:00

Being a writer, do I recognize the power of the written word more so than others? Maybe? Perhaps most non-writing people don't give the letters arranged on a paper much thought. The reading public aside, for they live for words. (and I live to write for them)
However....
It has come to my attention that in this political climate of bipartisanship, words have become so much more important, we simply can't brush it off and say, 'Bygones'.
For the average person, spouting opinions is almost meaningless. For example; how much power does our hairdresser truly have as they are cutting our hair. We nod, we smile, we agree or disagree...no harm no foul.
Step up a notch.
A teacher's words? Maybe that has a little bit more power. We trust teachers to give children education, fair and equitable learning and hopefully no opinionated self-promoting ideas, or extremist thinking.
So what's another step up in power in words?
Our celebrities? Our sports heroes? Yes. Popularity, and status will make words even more powerful. Fans of these personas will listen, possibly become influenced to make decisions. Who can predict who will fall prey and who will ignore the opinion of a celebrity?
Let's up it a notch.
What about people of politics who have an enormous following of believers? How about religious leaders who spout extreme views?
How powerful are their words? Should they think carefully before they say things lightly? Things that people who idolize them believe in their ideology as gospel? Can we hold the power of words accountable for actions of people who look to those leaders for guidance?

Ah, here's the question to reckon with. Yes or no? Personally I don't compare politicians with strong followings of extremists with let's say, the effect of video games on childhood shootings. I think most people would agree that the games may help dehumanize humans, and push a slightly off child to do things they may not do, but a leader?
Do we blame Osama bin Laden when he asks his followers to kill for his cause? I think we do. I think most of us hold him accountable. He is on the USA's most wanted list.
Do we hold our president accountable for his comments? Yes- to the point where the man can't talk because he is criticized with each breath he takes.
How about this latest crisis? Killing people in Arizona. Six dead. More than a dozen wounded.
And the target? Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords. According to dozens of articles I have read a certain 'Alaskan' politician, had this woman on her hit list- A HIT LIST- which virtually said to lock and load.
Should we hold people with political clout responsible for inciting people who have a tendency to kill with that push? Maybe. Maybe not.
But if our president had a 'hit list' and someone was targeted, I wonder who the media would blame then?
I know opening this can of worms is going to become my own 'criticize GA Hauser' field day for hot political debate. I have strong feelings about gay rights...duh? Read any Hauser books lately? Yet I also believe in Capitalism, the death penalty...the environment...animal rights...good lord! A cop friend told me one day I would explode because I had both extreme left and right opinions and some day I would spontaneously combust. That would be something to see.
I was nicknamed 'enviro-cop' because when someone at Greenlake was shooting Canada geese, yes, I would volunteer for the call. I arrested someone for killing a sparrow with a beebee gun for animal cruelty. A felony. My fellow cops thought I had lost my mind.

But...my opinions on politics, gay rights, love, hate, sex...they are my own. I hold the influence of a gnat over the general public who wouldn't know my name if you shoved all of my 60 plus books into their faces.
If I was powerful. If I had the following of millions, should I be responsible for my words then? Yes! Should I put out a hit list of all the people I disagree with? Tempting...yes! But I am not a fanatic who thinks people who do not share my opinion need to become targets to kill. Whether this Alaskan politician thought she was being clever, cute, or a funny bunny, she does influence people. And you want to find an extremist on the edge waiting for that push? They are on every block, every corner.
Ask bin Laden if his words are meant to incite hate, murder, mayhem. Nah, he's just a sweet old man with a beard. His words don't really mean anything. He can't be held responsible if someone actually blows themselves up and kills a few others with them. Hey, those bombers obviously would have done it anyway.
The words didn't mean a thing.

Get a clue. Words are everything. They can make you cry. They can make you laugh. They tell you what to do when they are spoken from authority in a command. Believe me, when I was in uniform and told you to get out of the car and show me your hands, you did it. My words were very powerful because of who I was. A little cop with a big gun.

In this age of horrible politics and hatred of opposing ideas, words can kill. And people in power need to act responsibly and understand, yes, there are dull minds out there who are looking for a reason to murder. Our leaders and people who wish they had the brains to lead, should know better.

I don't usually write anything this political, guys, but some individuals in our country are so out there in what they say and do, this writer couldn't stop her fingers from working the keyboard.

Words. POWERFUL. Never underestimate how words influence actions. And never! pretend people who make out 'hit lists' propose H8...or cry foul when someone else wins fairly in an election, are just sweet little harmless housewives from Alaska. They are very dangerous individuals indeed.

Please....be careful out there, and mind your words. Spout kindness. Talk civil equality. And most of all...don't protect the very people who are supporting unstable extremists of any kind.

As The Year Winds Down...

2010-12-22T17:46:00.000-08:00

As 2010 leaves us and 2011 begins I suppose it's natural for each of us to reflect on exactly what kind of a year we have had.

Years, months, days, hours and minutes create perpetual change. Some events bringing elation and joy, others deep sorrow and grief.

For many of us we have rejoiced at weddings and birthdays and cried tears of sadness at our loved ones sickness or loss.

But as each year advances, we learn, we change, and hopefully life gives us wonderful opportunities to grow.

2010 was full of changes for myself and many of my friends. As one would expect, life will constantly pose challenges to navigate and with hard work and an attitude of never accepting defeat, the potential of rewards are great. As I look back on my personal year of growth and discovery, I feel a sense of accomplishment at another dozen books behind me, and of the new fans I have met who have become close friends. The affection and loyalty of some people is a thing of wonder to me. While in my life I have seen the dark side of people, greed, selfishness and each of seven deadly sins, on the positive side, there are some pretty spectacular individuals who have come into my life this year, who I can't appreciate enough.

I suppose if we can look in the mirror and say to ourselves, we did the best we could do and didn't hurt others in the process then we have done very well indeed.

Though the year 2010 has been topsy turvy in politics and war, I think I can leave that summary to those who spout the news. We all know who did their best and who did their worst for the freedom and civil rights of individuals.

As the year closes, I think all I would like to say is Thank You. Thank you to the many people who email me, connect with me on a very human level, and who have touched my life deeply, though they may not know.

I wish everyone who reads this, a year of peace, promise, and hope. Because without it, life is too hard to tackle.

Happy 2011.

Be safe out there in an insane world.
G.A

hu-man (hyoo' man)

2010-08-01T10:00:00.000-07:00

Being Human.
There are so many things to say about us where do I begin?

Human Beings- Well...that accounts for us upright two-legged creatures who dominate the planet and spew our garbage into air, water and earth. Okay, got that covered.

Human Kindness- That rare virtue we cherish because quite frankly it isn't common. And when we feel nurtured by it, we comment about it and give it it's own 'Human' name.

'To Err is Human, to Forgive Divine'- Think about this one. We are human to err, to make mistakes, but if we offer forgiveness to someone, (presumably another human) we are made out to be divine. Godly? That makes forgiveness rare indeed. Either that or angels and divine spirits walk among us. They do keep themselves hidden, don't they?

Human Behavior- My oh my! Behavior. Does that include abnormal behavior? Like perhaps a human who kills, lights fires, tortures animals...is that still 'human'? Or have we crossed the line to 'inhuman' behavior. How humans behave is a topic of very high interest. Reality TV is obviously our personal insight into the Human Behavior on a public forum. How do we explain our actions? Anyone? Anyone? Would love an answer to that question.

Only Human- I take it that's a catch-all for all our screw ups. Well, you know, I'm 'only human'. I did what I did because...that's what humans do. Isn't it?

My favorite.
Human Nature- Nature. The way each life is bound to another, the cycles of life and death, the nature of attraction and love. What is human nature as compared to nurture? Is who we are as a human purely genetics or do we learn as we grow? Are killers born to killers? Philanthropists heirs of philanthropists? We certainly know actors are children of actors. (Small wonder there.Don't get me started on that one!)
But I'm talking about 'Human Nature'. This is even more important than politics or religion. This is who we are at our very base. And though some humans think they can decide on what is humanly natural and humanly unnatural in the aspect of love and sex, doesn't Mother Nature make those laws?
As organic creatures we are what we are. Who we love is who we love, and what we do is partly because of our make up as the creatures we became through Darwin's amazing discovery.

As humans we tend to go into downward spirals. Just look a the economy, the wars we create, the number of inmates incarcerated, gun crime...well, the list is too long. Rare is the humanitarian story of the Good Samaritan, unless its a good human in which bad things have befallen.
Okay, the news thrives on terror and fear, this we all know. But look around at your fellow humans. Are they smiling and laughing their way through life and not drunk, in an asylum, or on happy pills? Or troubled by bills, illness, addiction...
We are all human here in this world. And we should be allowed to act human as nature provides.
Is it wrong to allow people to love, laugh and form attachments to others, as human nature proves itself time and again?
It has always amazed me that one human thinks it can impose its beliefs and mores on another. Laws protecting people, yes. Of course. But rules on whom to love? Here we draw closer to being inhuman.

Human Beings...join the Human Race.
Isn't it human to want to see others joy? To see others grow, prosper and learn? Or do we always have to portray the dark side of Human Nature, and be envious, greedy, controlling and vicious? The choice is ours as to how we behave. But as we all want the freedom to choose, as human beings, we should grant that freedom to everyone without referendums and laws.

Be safe out there among your fellow humans.

Pride

2010-06-30T07:17:00.000-07:00

Sometimes it seems as if the United States has made a move to the extreme right. I don't like talking politics, religion, or the Great Pumpkin, but as I am fresh from my trip from San Francisco, during the Pride weekend, I will make an exception.

Many of you who know me, or know my ranting...ahum...get the feeling I don't like where I live at the moment. They are correct. I live in Ohio, or as I commonly refer to it among friends, 'O-Hell-O'. I may get a lot of slack for this negative nickname of a 'beloved' state, but heck, everyone's entitled to their opinion. I think writers are number two behind loud mouthed politicians for being outspoken, but again, that's a personal view.

Standing in an enormous crowd on Market Street, watching literally tens of thousands of spectators enjoying the spectacle, was surreal. There in the parade were hundreds of culturally diverse groups, mega companies, religious organizations ...etc...showing their rainbow colors.
I thought, 'what the heck?' Truly I am not in Kansas (or Ohello) any longer. Suddenly I was in a world that embraced diversity, love, and civil rights for all to marry, and be themselves.

I have to admit, I cried. The fact that there are areas of the country that support same sex love, marriage, and a multitude of other ideas that free thinking inspires, made me emotional. It was bliss.
Why then, are we so silent the rest of the year? How can so many corporations, including banks, huge department store chains, car manufacturers, and religious groups, stay quiet as the far right scream and stomp their anti-freedom views?

I don't know. Another question without an answer. Perhaps we are not silent, we are just not as manic. But the time I spent with my married male friends, and the sense of freedom Gay Pride gave me, will be something that will stay with me forever.

It strengthens my resolve to keep up the fight. To combat the nonsense against gay society; to stop the far right from not giving everyone the choice to live how they choose in a country as strong and open as our good ole USA. It has to change. I do believe we have the power to make it happen.
And standing in the crowd at the Pride Parade in a city like San Francisco convinced me.
It's the reason I write my novels. To open closed minds to the idea of love of all kinds. And I won't stop.

Keep fighting for what you believe in. In reality, it's what makes this country so great to begin with. We just have to find ourselves. We've become lost in a quagmire of a few who think they know what's best for everyone.

Be safe out there.

Interview with Mark Antonious Richfield

2010-06-10T13:04:00.001-07:00

After much pestering on my account, I finally was able to book an interview with the very busy Mark Richfield. We met at his day job at Parsons and Company and I had my chance to ask the many questions on my mind about this man who is the talk of the town. When I get my first glance at this hunk he’s in his tight black slacks, (no panty-lines, so we know what that means) and a black, cotton shirt, opened at the neck. I sit down beside him on a leather couch in the employee lounge with my list of questions.

GA: Hi, Mark…we finally meet.

Mark: We do.

GA: Wow. Your handshake is electric.

Mark: Don’t get carried away already.

GA: Sorry. Uh, where was I?

Mark: (Laughs) You said hello.

GA: Yes. Right. (Sniffing the air) Is that the famous cologne?

Mark: I assume that’s what you’re smelling. (He sniffs)

GA: (Leaning closer) Holy cow. If that’s not the cologne I want whatever it is in a bottle.

Mark: Did you actually have something to ask me? Or did you just come to sniff me?

GA: I came to sniff you. Kidding. Um. Sorry. Yes, let me ask you some questions. What’s the deal with the accent? Is it really British or what?

Mark: Really British? I lived there for pity’s sake. I know how they talk. All this chatter about how I speak. Such rubbish.

GA: I hear it now. Does it come out more when you’re mad?

Mark: So I’ve been told. I can’t tell the bloody difference, but I’m reminded constantly.

GA: Okay…Some of your fans wished you’d married Jack Larsen instead of Steve Miller.

Mark: I did marry Jack, and Adam, and Steve. Shh, don’t write that down.

GA: Too late. No, I mean, lived with Jack. Chose Jack.

Mark: Jack’s had enough of me. Really. I think if we were together as a couple I would drive him mad. And not in a good way.

GA: But Steve and Alex, your son, they seem to always be in trouble.

Mark: Jack would be worse. I assure you. Steven has more willpower when it comes to Alexander. He didn’t lust after me at eighteen like Jackie did.

GA: Uh…

Mark: Yes? (Laughs shyly)

GA: Sorry, lost myself on the color of your eyes. They’re really green. Um…oh. Are you going to go to London with Steve and Alex some day?

Mark: That is the plan. Though now that Alexander is in school and working, I don’t know when he’ll have the spare time.

GA: Will you ever get tired of modeling?

Mark: The question should be, will the agency ever tire of me. The answer to that is yes.

GA: That ain’t gonna happen.

Mark: Now you sound like Steve.

GA: I wish I were Steve, believe me.

Mark: But you both worked as police officers.

GA: Uh, no, that’s not why. Never mind.

Mark: Get your mind out of the gutter, Ms. Hauser.

GA: Sitting next to you on a couch? Not possible.

Mark: (Smiles) Anymore questions?

GA: Tons. But I do have to ask you if you’ll ever write an autobiography.

Mark: No. Why? Who would want to know about my horrible childhood?

GA: Everyone? Look, there are a lot of other people who went through rough times. Maybe knowing the details of your life would not only be interesting, but would help others.

Mark: I’ll give it some thought. But to be honest, I’m a bore.

GA: Sure you are. What’s your next project? Anything new? More guest appearances on television?

Mark: I did get roped into another spot on Forever Young. I have no doubt I’ll live to regret it.

GA: Love that show.

Mark: Yes, so do I.

GA: You need to do another three-way scene with Keith O’Leary and Carl Bronson.

Mark: Ms. Hauser?

GA: Yes, Mark?

Mark: You do realize you have your hand on my thigh.

GA: Oh! Sorry. Man, is it hot in here? (Fanning myself with my pad)

Mark: (Smiles sweetly) I heard about you. (Wags his finger) Naughty, naughty.

GA: (Cleared my throat) Right. Well, how about we end this now before I really do something I’ll regret. Thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule to do this interview for your fans.

Mark: My pleasure. Anytime you would like to chat, feel free to call. (Stands up)

GA: Holy crap.

Mark: My eyes are up here, love.

GA: Sorry. I’ve really embarrassed myself today. I guess I didn’t really believe all the hype…until now.

Mark: I’m flattered. Really.

GA: Think about that autobiography.

Mark: I will do. If I can’t do a complete autobiography, I’d love to sit and talk about anything you fancy.

GA: Wow. That’s an offer I can’t refuse. I will take you up on that. (I shake his hand) I don’t want to let go.

Mark: Are you sure you’re not related to my Steven? (Laughs)

GA: I’m not sure of anything. My blood left my brain the minute I walked into this room. Anyway…thanks again for your time and good luck on your next adventure.

Mark: My pleasure.

Where have all our heroes gone?

2010-03-26T06:12:00.001-07:00

When I was a kid, (I know, it sounds like everyone's old man) No, but seriously, when I was a kid we looked up to people. There were men and women out there who did amazing things. Some for mankind, some for civil rights, others for the arts...
Now? Politicians are nightmarish parodies of themselves, ranting, fighting, making the masses angry and violent, sports stars are disgraced and create role models for criminals and cheaters, movie stars go into rehab like it's the corner store...
WTF?

Where are our heroes? What happened to the stand-outs of society that we could watch in awe and say, "I want to do that!"
Our new goal appears to be getting on a reality program, being the one to lose the most weight when we are obese, eating worms for prizes. Or some shows have people over-indulging and being applauded to keep consuming vile amounts of fatty food.
When did I go to sleep and wake up here?
We teach our children to depend on video games as friends, lose contact with people because the text is so much better than the phone or being face to face...
Where did we go wrong? Do I have a hero? If I did, wouldn't I end up naming someone from the 50's? 60's? Oh, Lord not the 70's!
How about 2010? Anyone you'd like to worship? Any pop-idol-dance-star-fallen-celeb? Ewww! God help us!

Anyone who knows me well, knows I do get on a soapbox about certain issues. I can't help it. It's the fire in my gut. But along with our loss of heroes, is our loss of civility. Again, I'll ask, where have all the nice people gone? Have they left with our generation of heroes? What happened to "Thank-you" "You're Welcome" "Please" "Can I help you?"
I'm not talking supermarket employees here. I mean you and me. PEOPLE in general. We cut each other off in our cars, flip the bird when we're mad, curse, are rude.
Am I really getting old? Is this what happens when you reach a certain age? You think the world has become mean and lost?
Someone, please...tell me of a modern day hero. I can't think of one who has given back to life, society, the world, and had meaning. I'm not saying all is lost, woe is me. I just want to find stand-out people who are doing something wonderful. I want my eyes to shine again with that glint of glorious hope.
I don't know about you, but I can't watch the news. Some of the pundits on the 24 hr news channels are trying to destroy common decency. They're mad as a hatter, yet continue to spew their garbage. I think it's time for a hero.
Superman? Batman? Anyone? Hello?
.................?????

Oh well. No answer.
I guess we really don't have heroes anymore.
Maybe we should be heroes ourselves. Hey, I have an idea. Why don't we be nice for a day? Give it a try. Let me know how it goes.

Why ask Why? The Double Standard of Censorship

2010-03-07T07:30:00.000-08:00

Why Ask Why? The Double Standard of Censorship

It occurred to me while watching a rented Almodovar video, Bad Education, that censorship in this country is all screwed up. There I was, watching a video/DVD of a film, not on television, and two of the scenes were fuzzed out. Blurred! Both scenes were depicting one man giving head to the other. I was speechless. Curiosity got the best of me, so, I purchased this film ‘uncut’ from Amazon. I watched it once more. The scenes that were censored did not show a male organ in a man’s mouth. They showed a head of hair, bobbing up and down. No visual sexuality was even portrayed to begin with.

Again, it got me thinking.

Why?

Why did they blur a rented video of two scenes that didn’t show anything but a head of hair?

Lately on the non-pay cable television channels, they are playing movies, during the day, mind you, not after ten pm, of horror films. I’m not talking about Hitchcock here, I’m talking slasher/bloody/violent films, that never should be aired on regular television at all. I hate to endorse them by name but will to prove my point. Movies like Saw, for which I have no clue why they even make money or draw so many viewers.

Advertisements flood my television, more now than I have ever seen in my life. Some channels, every four or five minutes of show is interrupted by four or five minutes of commercials, but that’s for another debate. The movies I was being bombarded with make me cringe. Sorority Row? Showing young girls being tortured and murdered? And of course wonderfully child-friendly-wholesome Saw IV shows a severed head in a scale on the video cover. Let’s not forget the Hostel series. (Yes, series! Loads of them!) Young women hanging upside down naked and gagged on conveyer belts headed to slaughter. Need I go on?

Seth Rogen appeared on Jay Leno’s show to promote his new film at the time, Zack and Miri Make a Porno. His stick-figure promotion billboard was banned in Utah, yet they showed the Saw promo with an old man’s face peeled off and used as a mask on another person.

Am I the only one who thinks something is seriously wrong here?

I can’t buy, beg, borrow or steal a video, (other than real porn) that shows a man full frontally nude for more than a split second, if at all. When two men kiss on TV they either cut it or rant and rave with picket signs at the studio. I heard Brokeback Mountain was cut so much in Italy it was virtually lost in translation.

Which brings me to the censors themselves. Who are they? Are they the religious right? Conservative republicans? Closet homophobes? What message are they sending to young people? No. Change that. What message are they sending to ALL people?

I’ll tell you what message! Murder and rape young women, eviscerate, behead, skin alive, torture in any way you desire to give perverted sociopaths the biggest hard-on, and for GOD’S SAKE DON’T MAKE PEOPLE GAY!

Gay Love is banned. BANNED. Same sex couples on television are portrayed either as sterile, a-sexual, or comic parody stereo-types, that quite frankly make me ill. What’s happened to our freedom of speech, our sexual rights when it comes to representing physical love between healthy consensual adults? Where has it gone?

Are we surprised when we dig up women’s bodies in a house that homed a sex offender? We promote that behavior. We encourage it. In an interview, infamous murderer Ted Bundy revealed how much he loved those sex/gore/torture films of young women. My! Aren’t we making Ted Bundy happy in hell? We are encouraging the connection between sexual gratification and extreme violence.

Why?

Why are we allowing uncensored gore, and censored love? I’ll never stop asking that question.

Every day men and women are denied sexual freedom to love, marry, and enjoy a life together without persecution, while sexual predators are not locked up permanently because THEY have rights. I will ask it every day. Why? Do we value sexual deviants’ rights more than GLBT rights? It seems so. Yes. At least on the big screen, big money issues.

Perhaps there is a place for gory horror films. (In my opinion, the trash) but there is a mega-market, which begs the question yet again, why? Who are these gore-fest addicts, but that’s for a shrink to figure out, not I.

What I want to know is, why I can’t see men having sex together on film in a gay romance movie? Why is my rented video blurred out? Why when two men kiss is it a scandal? (or two women, for that matter.)

I’ll tell you why. The people making the decisions have a warped sense of right and wrong. And there seems to be no way to stop them.

I’m trying. One book at a time. But I cannot fix the severely ignorant; The censors who place violence above all for money. No GA Hauser romance novel will ever correct that nightmare.

After seeing those horror scenes in reality in my career as a police officer, I can only wish you all peace and love in your lifetime and may none of the events promoted and encouraged in the above horrific films ever happen to you or the ones you love.

--GA Hauser

(this blog was originally posted on Book Wenches Dec 2009)

Wars: life's a battleground

2010-01-30T14:36:00.000-08:00

I guess through experience you learn that life consists of a series of trials by fire. Perhaps it begins at childbirth while your mom screams bloody murder and you're born crying. Too deep? Perhaps.
But I sometimes believe some of us are born warriors, while others choose to sit and watch, be trampled underfoot or observe other's battle. I have no idea what drives each of us to this crusade, but, some of us are always on the front lines.
Look around. Not everyone can be a cop, fire-fighter, soldier, bodyguard, or work in a jail or emergency room. Most don't.
Life gives each of us challenges, and no matter whom you talk to you'll hear their story of how they have fought an illness, a court dispute, or even a neighborhood property line argument. We are all on the front lines, some more than others. I have also learned through experience that you should only put your efforts into battle when;, and listen closely- When You Are Right.
I'm not taking any moral high ground, here, but, fight when you're right. I believe when someone is 'wronged' and everything points to the obvious villain, give it all you've got.
Yet if you don't choose your battles wisely, you will exhaust yourself and do nothing else.
But if you have been delivered an illegal hit--- Get your armor on. Grab your weapon and stand and deliver.
Maybe it's the Capricorn in me, I don't know. But I am never afraid of a good fight- If I Am Right. I know when I am not right. Beginning a war against someone because of ego, spite, hatred, intolerance, or just plain stupidity, does not make it right. Think carefully about what you are doing when you run over someone and ask yourself, was that a smart, thoughtful thing to do to that person? Did I pick on them for my own selfish gain or ego?
If you have, I'll warn you. Don't start that battle, you will lose.

But--- if you are in the right, you have been trampled heedlessly, treated less than human or without respect to your rights and liberties. FIGHT. Let me tell you from experience from someone who has been on the front lines. If you set up for the tackle, you can win. Hold tight to your pride, your self-respect, and hit the bastards where they deserve it.

Battles are won and lost every day in this life. And each of us pursues our personal demons. But never allow someone to mistreat you and gloat. Turn the other cheek if you can, but if you are wronged, fight, baby, fight. You will win. Take it from me, the re-incarnated soldier. (destiny? Who knows.)But if you need an ally, you got me right by your side.

The Game of Blame

2010-01-07T05:58:00.000-08:00

I suppose since I was a police officer, I could honestly say, "I've seen it all." I've seen drug addicts blame each other for their heroin habits, poor drivers blame one another for an accident, husbands and wives blame each other for a domestic battle, and cop shooters blame the cop for asking to be shot.
When did we forget to say, "I made a mistake, I did it." Or, "I'm sorry." The finger pointing has gotten so out of hand, its global. Republicans blame the state of the country on democrats, and visa versa, one country accuses the other of environmental damage, it goes on and on.
Let me tell you something you may not know. We -WE- are responsible for our actions. No, your over-bearing mother did not make you a wife-beater, YOU- are a wife-beater. And for, of course, the ebook stealers, (you know I can't forget them) watching them justify their behavior as the author's fault or the website's fault or...well, it was free so I took it's fault, is laughable. I'm sorry, people! You did it! You stole it, you broke it, you over-indulged, you behave the way you do because of YOU!
How many times do we see someone stand up and admit they were wrong? Only a few stars who are shamed or into the publicity? Is that it?
What about on a personal level? Who says, "I did it. I was wrong. I'm sorry?" It's as if we can't handle the blame any longer. I'm sorry. Let me tell you all. I'm sorry to tell you If you steal, you are a thief. If you kill, you are a murderer. Simple as that.

Here in Ohio a cop processed a driver for being over the alcohol limit. That cop later was ambushed by the drunk. He was shot. Luckily he survived. What did the drunk do? He blamed the cop for catching him? for processing him for drunk driving? I'm sorry to tell you, the drunk was shot and killed. Sorry to tell you, he's dead.
No. To be honest. I'm not sorry. Those who do illegal things and blame others, then get punished? I blame them. Sorry.

Pirate sites

2010-01-04T12:05:00.000-08:00

Pirate sites have long been the bane of any writer's existence, but the number of illegal downloads cropping up has become epic. And not EPIC in a good electronic publication way. Though ebooks are the wave of the future, the theft of them and the lack of prosecution and jurisdiction has made the battle uphill. Authors rely on the goodness of humans to buy, not steal their novels. And at 1.00-5.00 a book, come on, people? Really? Can't buy a book for a buck?
Sad but true. And though the problem is widespread, it's the same morons who upload the novels once they have been taken down, through a long process of notices and hoops. Why do these people do it? Getting their jollies? Power tripping? or just the rush of a freebie to share? I have no clue. But being an ex-cop, I have never understood the sense of stealing what does not belong to you. Perhaps it's just a value of a normal person, and the abnormal ones don't get it.

But I ask any reader of ebooks to respect your beloved authors and discourage, name and shame, and do not support the illegal sites. In fact, help get rid of them. Join groups to delete their nasty existence from our planet.