Interview with Mark Antonious Richfield

After much pestering on my account, I finally was able to book an interview with the very busy Mark Richfield. We met at his day job at Parsons and Company and I had my chance to ask the many questions on my mind about this man who is the talk of the town. When I get my first glance at this hunk he’s in his tight black slacks, (no panty-lines, so we know what that means) and a black, cotton shirt, opened at the neck. I sit down beside him on a leather couch in the employee lounge with my list of questions.

GA: Hi, Mark…we finally meet.

Mark: We do.

GA: Wow. Your handshake is electric.

Mark: Don’t get carried away already.

GA: Sorry. Uh, where was I?

Mark: (Laughs) You said hello.

GA: Yes. Right. (Sniffing the air) Is that the famous cologne?

Mark: I assume that’s what you’re smelling. (He sniffs)

GA: (Leaning closer) Holy cow. If that’s not the cologne I want whatever it is in a bottle.

Mark: Did you actually have something to ask me? Or did you just come to sniff me?

GA: I came to sniff you. Kidding. Um. Sorry. Yes, let me ask you some questions. What’s the deal with the accent? Is it really British or what?

Mark: Really British? I lived there for pity’s sake. I know how they talk. All this chatter about how I speak. Such rubbish.

GA: I hear it now. Does it come out more when you’re mad?

Mark: So I’ve been told. I can’t tell the bloody difference, but I’m reminded constantly.

GA: Okay…Some of your fans wished you’d married Jack Larsen instead of Steve Miller.

Mark: I did marry Jack, and Adam, and Steve. Shh, don’t write that down.

GA: Too late. No, I mean, lived with Jack. Chose Jack.

Mark: Jack’s had enough of me. Really. I think if we were together as a couple I would drive him mad. And not in a good way.

GA: But Steve and Alex, your son, they seem to always be in trouble.

Mark: Jack would be worse. I assure you. Steven has more willpower when it comes to Alexander. He didn’t lust after me at eighteen like Jackie did.

GA: Uh…

Mark: Yes? (Laughs shyly)

GA: Sorry, lost myself on the color of your eyes. They’re really green. Um…oh. Are you going to go to London with Steve and Alex some day?

Mark: That is the plan. Though now that Alexander is in school and working, I don’t know when he’ll have the spare time.

GA: Will you ever get tired of modeling?

Mark: The question should be, will the agency ever tire of me. The answer to that is yes.

GA: That ain’t gonna happen.

Mark: Now you sound like Steve.

GA: I wish I were Steve, believe me.

Mark: But you both worked as police officers.

GA: Uh, no, that’s not why. Never mind.

Mark: Get your mind out of the gutter, Ms. Hauser.

GA: Sitting next to you on a couch? Not possible.

Mark: (Smiles) Anymore questions?

GA: Tons. But I do have to ask you if you’ll ever write an autobiography.

Mark: No. Why? Who would want to know about my horrible childhood?

GA: Everyone? Look, there are a lot of other people who went through rough times. Maybe knowing the details of your life would not only be interesting, but would help others.

Mark: I’ll give it some thought. But to be honest, I’m a bore.

GA: Sure you are. What’s your next project? Anything new? More guest appearances on television?

Mark: I did get roped into another spot on Forever Young. I have no doubt I’ll live to regret it.

GA: Love that show.

Mark: Yes, so do I.

GA: You need to do another three-way scene with Keith O’Leary and Carl Bronson.

Mark: Ms. Hauser?

GA: Yes, Mark?

Mark: You do realize you have your hand on my thigh.

GA: Oh! Sorry. Man, is it hot in here? (Fanning myself with my pad)

Mark: (Smiles sweetly) I heard about you. (Wags his finger) Naughty, naughty.

GA: (Cleared my throat) Right. Well, how about we end this now before I really do something I’ll regret. Thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule to do this interview for your fans.

Mark: My pleasure. Anytime you would like to chat, feel free to call. (Stands up)

GA: Holy crap.

Mark: My eyes are up here, love.

GA: Sorry. I’ve really embarrassed myself today. I guess I didn’t really believe all the hype…until now.

Mark: I’m flattered. Really.

GA: Think about that autobiography.

Mark: I will do. If I can’t do a complete autobiography, I’d love to sit and talk about anything you fancy.

GA: Wow. That’s an offer I can’t refuse. I will take you up on that. (I shake his hand) I don’t want to let go.

Mark: Are you sure you’re not related to my Steven? (Laughs)

GA: I’m not sure of anything. My blood left my brain the minute I walked into this room. Anyway…thanks again for your time and good luck on your next adventure.

Mark: My pleasure.